The Goddess of Elements
by lauralovessirius
Summary: This is the story of Sirius's first love...a love to stand the test of time... she has hidden her identity so she can't be found by the minions of the dark wizard coming to power but can Saralina White stay hidden? will sirius find out who she is? sb/oc
1. Chapter 1

**alright yall this is my very first story...kind of my baby so be nice...kay? but tell me if it sucks...nicely? :) **

**oh and the only ones i own are the three you dont recognize...the rest belong to j.k. !!!!!**

chapter one - the beginning

There i sat. Waiting. Counting the ticks of the clock as i waited for the small hand to get to the eleven.

Maybe i should take this time to introduce myself....My name is Saralina White. Yeah i know what you're thinking....not another one of those pureblood maniacs. Just to clue you in, I'm **NOTHING** like my family got that?!?! Good. My family is all about the purest blood. We are about the purest there is...and don't we know it. My family is part wizard part....now don't freak okay? Part Goddess. On my mother's side of course. You see centuries ago there were these monsters. They were called the Entities. Legend has it that there was a powerful Kingdom called Utopia. Heard of it? Of course in your world it's probably a myth...well in this story it was a full blown country in itself.

Well ever since I was little I was told I was destined for big things. Enormous things. Things that could shake the very existence of our world as we know it. I don't really understand the whole thing myself.

Well when i was little i was branded with a mark. The mark of the Gods.

In my story it has a huge significance. Back to the land of Utopia. Well the monsters were about the ugliest creatures on the planet. It's a well known fact that they had always tried to steal the beauty of a God. It seems the only way to do that is to take the life of a baby born to the most purest being that lived in the Utopia. The Goddess of Elements. One day the Entities had snuck in and stolen the child of the Queen. Which at the time happened to be the Goddess of Elements. (surprise, surprise) They also weren't very good in there subtlety. The leading creature in the Entities was a woman named Shantee. She was the daughter of a banshee and a mongrel. One of the most evil people to inhabit this _very _lovely place we call Earth. (thinly veiled sarcasm if ya didn't catch it) I'm not usually this pessimistic, I guess the story of my _wonderful_ ancestors is getting to me. My ancestors weren't huge snobs like my family is now though. They believed in equal and fair people as well. They of course never let humans in the Utopia though for fear of losing the purity they held dear.

These Entities, they couldn't disguise themselves as Gods and Goddesses seeing as they were hideous beyond compare from years and years of evil wearing down on them. they had studied the Gods and did not fail to notice how unbearabely kind they were which i suppose was their ultimate downfall though humans weren't allowed in Utopia, they were allowed to the gates if they were injured or sore, poor you name it.

Have you heard of Hercules? How he fell in love with a human and would have given his life for her. That story was vaguely based on one of the gods that lived there.

So these Entities knew of the rules of the Gods and decided if they couldn't disguise themselves as Gods then they were gonna do it as injured humans. Well lets just say they passed with flying colors. (my ancestors obviously weren't that smart...i mean if i saw one of the most hideous creatures in the world i would be a little wary of them as well huh?) As some Entities distracted the guards of the gates the others infiltrated every building and incapacitated every God. Well the King and Queen had not heard of anything yet as the guards were disposed of and could not call for assistance or ring the alarms. One of the Queens midwives had heard of the attack and ran to the castle as fast as she could. She was named Carmena. She is the saving grace of our family. If she hadn't rescued that baby none of us would be alive today. She snuck in, told the King and Queen and they asked her to take the child to the land of the humans....(aka the wizarding world) The baby she saved from the Entites name was Sherise and the tradition of naming their daughters with an "S" name is still going strong obviously. My mother's name is Shawni. Me as her daughter and the most powerful goddess the world has seen since my ancient ancestor was named after the person who started it all, Saralina. (aka the queen)

Here I am. That story has been pounded into my brain since the moment i could comprehend words. I needed to know every single detail of my ancestors which totally sucked. My family is counting on me as their ticket into the precious Utopia seeing as I am the most powerful ever to be turned out. No one in my family has been let back in because they all disgraced the name of Utopia by being utterly up themselves and greedy for power.

so now that you know my ancestor story, should i enlighten you as to why I'm here?

I have been refused my proper schooling ever since i got the letter when i was eleven. Now that I am sixteen my family thought 'hey maybe she DOES need proper magic training since she is part Wizard and got a letter for a reason'...no shit right? OF COURSE I DID!!!! Oh well waste not, want not.

Well seeing as goddesses need to hide their appearance, especially me in such dangerous times. You see I resemble a Goddess the most. I have curly black hair that shines beautifully in the light of the sun and moon, and the bottom layer of my hair is bright snow white and board straight. Strange i know but it makes an amazing combination. My eyes are start of blue on the edge of the iris, the fade into green, then yellow as they reach the pupil. I have perfectly plump pink lips and beautiful pale skin. My body of course was perfectly hourglass. (total goddess from head to toe like i said) Well seeing as i need to hide my appearance and of course my name I am looking now like a plain teenage girl with brown wavy hair and chocolate brown eyes. i have tan skin and a petite figure with absolutely barely any curves in sight. It felt a little weird but since i wouldn't be gawked at by teenage boys and fourty year old men alike this would be awesome. Now though my name isn't Saralina White while i go to this school, i will be known as Terry Gray. Yeah I know, kind of ironic but hey...i like it.

Well there is one crucial part of my childhood you haven't yet heard about. His name is Sirius Black and he was my best friend until he left to come to Hogwarts...

I have known him since we were both infants in swaddling clothes crying for our mamas...doesn't that just sound absolutely adorable? Yeah another thing, I was totally and completely head over heels for him. He claimed to be the same for me, I believe him though. Ever since we were six we decided we would be boyfriend and girlfriend. He was my first friend, boyfriend, first kiss, and first love. We talked until we were ten when he came here and I'm so nervous to see him and his AMAZING metallic silver looking eyes. They look almost like chrome....(sigh) lovely i know. He was the sweetest guy i knew, and he even gave me a sterling silver necklace for my birthday with out initials carved into the back of a sun/moon (thats the crest of the gods i have branded into my back). I still wear it every day and if I'm lucky he will still be the sweetest guy in the world. I mean he was practically my world. When my family was horrible i would run to him and he would make everything better. So here I am on the train walking through it looking for a compartment.

Which leads me to where you found me...one...two...three...fou OOMPH!!!!

What the hell? What was that? All i know is that I'm on the floor and this blockhead is laying on top of me!!! Plus this horrible pain in my head i feel from bashing it on my trolley. I reached back there to feel my head and...yep blood. Just as i thought. Oh well, it will heal. Goddesses heal unbelievably fast.

Okay back to the block head...

"Hey are you okay?" no I'm not bloody okay you kind of made me bash my head into a corner thanks... "Hello??"

"Hi, who are you?" i asked...trying not to be too rude seeing as i just met him and he's standing there looking so embarrassed. Wow he looks kind of roughed up. He has a long scratch going from his forehead to his chin on the left of his face and has topaz eyes and honey brown hair. He's kind of gorgeous.

"I'm Remus Lupin, and shouldn't I be asking you that? I gather you are new?"

"Oh yeah I am. My name is...uh..." shit...i forgot my name...crap...what? OH YEAH!!!

"Your forgot your name?" he asked me a bemused look on his handsome scarred face.

"Um of COURSE not blockhead, geez...my name is Terry Gray." Geez that was a close one.

"Oh well I'm guessing you aren't a first year."

"Nope! I'm a duck with no place to rest my behind because i have no friends. Who wants to be friends with a duck anyway...." i cried out startling him but making him laugh...

"Ha, okay well you, young duckling. Would you like to sit with me and my buddies? I'm pretty sure they would like you." YAY!! I scored someone with friends!

Fantastic!!!!!!!!

So as he was showing me to his friend's compartment, and then we were confronted with a group of giggling girls and one sour looking redhead. As I accidentally bumped into the peroxide looking blonde that seemed to be leading them she looked at me like I was the vermin of the earth....oh if she only knew who i was.

"Um, excuse you!" She sneered at me with a horrible nasally voice that seemed to be unbelievably annoying...oh wait, it doesn't seem unbelievably annoying.

"Who do you think you are, you skanky whore to bump into me? God i have her nerdy germs on me!!!" Oh please this girl is calling me a whore when she's wearing a skirt that barely covers her ass and a tube top that her stuffed a-cups are falling out of... and yeah you can totally tell its stuffed because they are totally uneven.

Hiii-larious!!!

"Well, excuse me. First you call me a whore than you call me a nerd? Which am I, Miss invisible knickers and stuffed bra?" yeah i went there.

"Umm i don't know what you're talking about this is all natural wannabe. Ugh you are so plain....Look at you!"

"Well I'm sorry you are soo insecure that you have to pick on other people, maybe you wouldn't be if you hadn't gotten that horrible nose job." Man it looks like Remus is turning purple he's trying so hard not to laugh. That redhead's not even holding it in though she letting it all out! Amazing! I even turned one of her own on her. "Well this chat has been most illuminating, but I have to go meet my new friends so...come along Remmy!"

"Yeah, well I have to go meet my **boyfriend** Siri-poo so maybe you should stay away from him if you are going to meet Remus's friends." Siri-poo?!?! Please tell me that is not Sirius Black!!!!! As in this is his girlfriend?!?!?!!? Oh my god Oh my god this is absolutely amazing!!!!!!!!

Oh wait nevermind. He won't recognize me, I'm not Saralina White right now, I'm plain old Terry Gray. Riiigggghhhttt...i knew it.... my bad

I look at Remus and I whisper..."Sirius as in Sirius Black?" but he's not looking at me, he's looking at the girl next to the redhead. Well more like gaping ridiculously with a lovestruck look at her. She is pretty, but not like fake gorgeous like everyone else in the group.

She has a very subtle true beauty though. It's really soft and she looks like she doesn't even belong in this group because she looks so sweet!

"Well tah Remus and loser...unless you would rather walk with me, Lily, and Rose?" she simpered to him.

"UMm we are all going the same way so why not?" Remus looked pleadingly at me.

"Super!" she gaggled.

"Let's go loverboy...." i groaned as we followed the three girls to the compartment.

Well the girls made it first and closed the door right in our faces. I looked exasperatingly at Remus as he rolled his eyes at me. As he pulled open the door I could hear these disgusting slobbery noises and I looked in. "Miss stuffer" (as i affectionately decided to call her) had decided to latch herself on some poor guys face! Wow and it looked like she was eating it! ewww.....like a...what did she look like? She was like strattling him on the bench...OH! She looked like a praying mantis that's what it was...yeah...gross..i know.

Then there was miss redhead..I'm guessing Lily? and Rose is the other one, the one Remus was lusting after...ha...lusting i saw it...then there was an adorable boy with crazy black hair sticking up like a broomstick and circular wire framed glasses. He had an adoring look as he stared at Lily and she looked back at him in distaste. I don't know why, i wish a guy would look at me like that...(sigh) Wow two of these guys are gorgeous i can't wait to see the third. Oh man was i anxious... I can only picture what that god looks like now. Well not God, but...yeah you get what i mean...and...wait for it...they are coming up for air!!!! Oh my god!!!

Well the minute they look up is when Remus decides to introduce me to everyone.

"Hey guys, this is the new girl. Her name is Terry Gray and i found her looking for a compartment so I invited her here." he said staring at them with a look that screamed, ""BE NICE""!!!!!

I looked at everyone and the guy with the psycho hair looked at me with a friendly, playful smile and said, "Potter, James Potter". I laughed of course thinking he must have seen the James Bond movies and he knew that I put two and two together and laughed with me. I know he is a pureblood...all Potter's are so I can't help but wonder how he saw those movies. I have met him before though so obviously my disguise is working because he hasn't recognized me...we were kind of friends when i introduced him to Sirius turns out they got to stay friends.

Time to look at my love....

**sorry about leaving yall hanging...any reviews...don't forget, first story...please be nice :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**once again this does not belong to me...it belongs to jo rowling... (sad face)**

**chapter 2- the new him...**

Wow...he looks so much older...and hotter! I mean he was a cute little boy, but now he's gorgeous...mmmmm. And he's dating that slut. What am I gonna do about that??? I have to do something. I just don't know what!

"Umm...hello?" sirius asked, a little impatiently i might add...

"Oh, sorry...I'm Sar...Terry Gray ha..." crap sooo close!

"Okay and why are you in our compartment....you definantly aren't anything special..." he said with some contempt and a little resentment.

WHAT THE HELL?!?!!? did that honestly just come out of his mouth?!?!! Since when does he talk to people like that?!?!?! The Sirius i remember was a total gentleman no matter his upbringing...and now he's acting as snobby as Lucius, of course it's a different kind of snobby but still!!! He's my love! He never talked to or treated anyone like he was superior when we were kids why is he starting now?!?! As i started tearing up, it wasn't just hurt tears, but also angry tears. How could the love of my life, the sweet little boy i knew, grow up to be this pretentious condescending monster in front of me?!? You know what I did?

...

...

...

Absolutely nothing...I turned toward Lily and Rose and introduced myself...sat down...and engrossed myself in a book. Oh the joys of tuning out the world. But i did hear Remus and James hiss at him and smack him in the head...take that douche bag. Ugh I can't believe the nerve of him. I thought he was my best friend, my love, my future. Apparently i was wrong....he did change. And more than I ever thought possible.

I looked at Remus and asked if i could speak to him outside. Sirius and that bitch, (who i soon found out was named karissa) just laughed and went back to eating each other's faces but not before Sirius could put in a snide comment asking about why Remus would want to talk to a plain nerd like me. Now i know that the look i picked wasn't gorgeous or glamorous but that comment stung and I almost lost it all right there...

I finally had the nerve to look at him again. Him and his girlfriend were staring at me like I was a boring television show and I couldn't take it anymore...

"What the HELL is your problem?!" I bellowed. "You don't know me, hell you probably don't even remember my name. I didn't ask anything of you and I sure as shit don't give a damn what you think about me. So if you are trying to hurt me you might want to try again. You can say all you want but it's not my fault you two are so insecure with yourselves you have to be total assholes to everyone else." I can sure tell i took them by surprise...with one last smirk i strolled out of there like I owned the place even though I knew Remus could tell I was more than hurt he didn't say anything in front of them for which I am glad.

As i was tailed by Remus I ran out of that compartment without looking back. I think I heard more than one set of footsteps and a little quiet arguement which sounded like James and Sirius. I finally found an empty compartment and broke down. It was a few minutes before Remus found me but he did. He took one look at me and practically ran towards me with his arms outstretched. I of course looked at him like he was a psycho before i collapsed in his arms. I was bawling, i know. I also know I just met Remus but i needed to inform him of the reason I was so affected by someone I had just "met". Especially since that someone was one of his best friends. He had to know, and i needed to get this off my chest. With Remus i felt safe, like I could trust him. I also had an inkling that maybe he was hiding something as well.

After what seemed like hours (which was probably only minutes) i finally looked up. I had been crying (more like howling like a banshee) for a little while now so my eyes were red and puffy. My throat was also very sore. I looked up at him and he smiled a soft kind smile. He looked kind of nervous, and i could practically hear all of the questions swimming in his eyes. Well I looked down trying to gather my bearings...

Then i looked up at him " Let the questioning begin."

**sorry this chapter was so short...its kind of 3:03 in the morning so im kind of tired...write one tomorrow possibly**

**second chapter in one night though!! i am on a role! fantastic...love reviews**


	3. Chapter 3

**hey guys....im not Jo....i don't own any of this...enjoy!**

**Chapter 3- The Story**

He looked at me.... " Well i guess you can start at the beginning. Telling me why you are so hurt even though you barely know Sirius...well wait. You don't have to explain that to me. A lot of girls are like that. But I'm assuming with you, you have a story behind it... am i right?"

"Yeah" i croaked..."It's so much more than just in infatuation and I have known Sirius all of my existance. Ever since we were born our families have known each other."

"But right now i think it woud be best to tell you about my biggest secret, if you will share yours in return...?" I looked at him with one eyebrow raised as he turned six shades of white.

"I don't know what you are talking about." he stammered trying not to reach my eyes.

"Remus I have been hiding secrets my whole life...I think I can tell when someone else it too..." he looks at me with an almost devastated look.

"Alright, but you have to go first." he pleads....

"Alright Remus, I will go first." Well that story that I thought about at the beginning, about my ancestry, i just told him....even some I didn't think about on my way here. He listened raptly all the time. Nodding, gasping, sighing at the right times. Shooting me sympathetic glances as he listened his eyes glazed like he was picturing everything i was saying. I think somewhere in the back of my mind I heard someone on the other side of the door but I didn't have the energy to get up and look. I just needed to get this all off my chest. I cried and at one point in time I had to stop to get myself together, stopping at the parts when Sirius came into play in my life, not letting him know yet until Remus told me his secret. I don't know why but my secret life with Sirius seemed more important and sacred than my ancestry (even though it definantly shouldn't.)

When I was done I couldn't even bring myself to look Remus in the eyes. I could feel him watching me I just didn't want to see what was in his eyes. The feeling could be anger, disgust? What was it? I look up at him finally after a lifetime and I see, not anything I thought I would but I saw....pity and understanding...a little bit of sadness as well. I was pleasently surprised I guess. I told him though that I cannot have him telling everyone my secret, that it just has to be between me and him. He nodded of course, saying he would never betray my trust like that. So I asked him what his was. He asked me if maybe I would like to tell him mine and Sirius's story first but i politely declined and stated that I would enlighten him after he told me his secret.

He looked a tad uncomfortable as he shifted in his seat. It made me feel sad that he didn't trust me. I mean even though I had just met him I told this guy my life story (excluding Sirius of course) and I felt I could trust him with anything. Maybe he just didn't fell the same way. "If you don't trust me you don't have to tell me." I sighed a little downtrodden which I'm sure shown on my face.

"NO! That's not it at all. I was just wondering something. I promise I'm not trying to distract you again, but I was wondering if I could see the real you maybe sometimes soon? Also if you could tell me your powers? I mean I've read all about The Goddess Of Elements but I could never understand what they were saying when they talked about her power."

"All in time, but first tell me your story, then I will show you and give you just a little glimpse of what I can do." I said delighted that he wanted to know more about me. At this rate he's becoming my best friend and fast.

"Okay well here goes...I'm...well I'm..." He took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. "I'm a werewolf" he whispered. OMG WTF?!??!? This kind sweet guy that I've been spending all of my time with is a werewolf??? You have got to be kidding me. Oh my god i think I'm gonna cry. This poor sweet guy, a vicious beast on full moons....

"That must be so painful" i whimpered....I looked up at him and jumped on him squeezing the life out of him. "I'm so sorry! Your secret is safe with me, I promise."

"Thank you....now for you and Sirius. Got the story? Can I hear it?" he asked beseechingly.

(sigh) "Okay, but I might not be able to get through all of it. It hurts alot to just think about it, and talking about it makes it harder. I might break down."

He looks at me. "That's fine. I willl be right here if you need me."

So I took a deep breath. I'm about to tell him about the most important person in my life ever. Will he understand?

"Okay well ever since we were born we've known each other. When we were three we would hang out and throw things at each other, play in the dirt ya know the usual for little kids. Which, as it turns out, isn't the usual for purebloods but we did it anyway because we thought it was fun. If one of us got in trouble the other would do something bad so they would get in trouble too. We were never without the other. Well when we were six we were at this ball together. Me, wearing a poofy red and green dress (christmas) and him in deep green dress robes. We have always been a perfect match for each other. My hair was the usual all black and curly (when we were in front of people we would make all of my hair black) half up half down with red and green ribbons, and Sirius's straight onyx hair was hanging to right below his ears which made him look totally adorable, but a little mature for his age.

"You look really pretty tonight" he told me as he played with my hair in the garden on the fountain. We were sitting and watching all the couples dance in perfect synch with one another.

"Thanks" I mumbled my cheeks turning crimson with the compliment he paid me.

He grinned at me adoringly, leaned down, and pressed my lips in a soft kiss. It was amazing. At that point on, at the tender age of six, I knew i was in love with that kid. He even asked me to be his girlfriend. After that we were together even more. There was talk of arranged marriages and such but we hardly paid attention as long as we had each other. We would go out for ice cream and to the balls together no matter what it was. Until we turned nine and Sirius finally made what he thought about pureblood manics known. We had never told our families our beliefs. My mother and I felt the same....the way the goddesses were supposed to about humans. How we cared for them and were extremely compassionate. But my father, he was a different story. If he ever saw one in the street he would stop and mumble about how mudblood scum was tarnishing the earth we live in. My mother was terrified of him, but since it was an arranged marriage she couldn't leave him. It was against the goddess code. So one day Sirius and I were talking about muggleborns when his mother walked up. Well you have been his friend for six years so you should know what his mother is like huh?"

"Oh yeah, please go on" Remus said looking just as much into this story as he was into the other one.

"So she walked up and listened. Then she screamed at us, grabbed Sirius by the arm and told him he couldn't hang out with a mudblood lover like me because I was tarnishing his beliefs. Ha yeah right. That bitch was always stupid. Well as my family said he was messing with me, and his family thought I was messing with him, they said we could never see each other again. At that moment I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. I started screaming and crying clawing my way to him as he did the same to me. We finally got to each other, gave each other a chaste peck and said we would see eacher other soon. Then THEY pulled us away from each other. I cried of course for days after that. Until I woke up one night to a sound at my window. It was him. He came in and we hugged and just lay on my bed into the night until it was time for him to leave. Every night one of us would sneak into the other's room. We kept writing letters to each other as well. Well when we got our letters I was so excited! I would finally be able to see my love every single day! Be near him and hold him and snuggle with him. It was amazing. He came over and showed me his and I showed him mine. Then I told my mom and I was getting ready. I ran to her and jumped on her until she told me that I wasn't going. I would NOT go to school with that unbelievable prat of a boy if it was the last thing she did. I was devastated.

I ran to him and told him and we cried. We cried until we were too dry to do anything besides sob. He told me he had something for me and he never wanted me to take it off. I looked down at his hand and he had a necklace with a shape of a silver sun/moon (the crest of the gods) embedded with diamonds. On the back it had our initials and a vow of eternal love. I sobbed once again gave him a kiss and said I would never take it off.

"That was the last time I had seen him. We had written up until his second year when he just stopped all of a sudden. I hadn't heard from him since. When I saw him in the compartment just now that was the first time I had seen him in six years. And he was a complete douche bag. So now you know my story. Why it affected me so much what he was saying. Then we heard a very feminine gasp outside the door. I vaulted towards it and almost ripped it off it's hinges as I saw Lily sitting outside with tears rolling down her pink face. My rage grew.

"What the HELL do you think you are doing listening to our conversation. Did that BITCH you practically work for send you?!?!?!" i bellowed at her.

"No!! No i promise! I came to see if you were okay the way you tore out of the compartment and then yall were already into the conversation when I found you so yeah i did listen I'm so sorry. But your secrets are safe with me. No one will ever here anything from me if you don't want them to I promise. I was also wondering if we could be friends?" she said all of this very convincingly and she seemed like a very genuine girl so...what the hell okay

"Alright we can be friends. On one condition. Never tell anyone what you heard today. If anyone found out who I was I would be dead."

"Okay I promise. But was Sirius really like that? So sweet and kind?" She asked incredulously.

"Once upon a time Lily, once upon a time."

**So what did you think? Love? Hate? Let me know.**


	4. Chapter 4

**well the fourth chapter...man am i excited...the plot is thickening as we learn about our estranged lovers...and the past...this chapter we get to see what she looks like...hmm**

**and just a little glimpse into her powers... :) excited?**

**chapter 4- The Sorting...**

Wow...I cannot believe I just spilled my guts to two complete strangers about my life. It was very dangerous and surprisingly helpful. Okay I'm about to show them what I look like...my only question is...will they be weirded out? "Are you two ready?"

"Can't wait!" Lily exclaimed looking like Christmas had come early. Remus nodded never taking his eyes off of my face... Okay here goes nothing. I closed my eyes tightly, and thought about what I look like. I felt my self changing, my hair getting longer, softer, curlier. Felt my lips plumping up, my chest and ass growing a little and my muscles in my abs, arms, and legs tightening. I also grew a couple inches. As I opened my eyes I was a little apprehensive but as I saw the astonished and awed looks on their faces I felt strangely comforted.

"Oh my god Lina!! You are GORGEOUS!!!" Lily exclaimed. Remus looked me up and down and then straight into my eyes.

"My sentiments exactly." he said softly his voice a mixture of awe and acceptance. I smiled "Are you ready to see what I can do?" I asked a little more worried about this than I was about my appearance.

"Yes" they both said. So I pulled down the curtains to our compartment doors and turned towards them. The whites of my eyes, my pupils, and iris's looked like flames. Also the straight white bottom part of my hair turned fire red. They jumped back a little in fascination but I told them not to be afraid and to look at my hands. As they did so I took in their facial expressions and watched as their eyes widened and I also looked down at my hands. Right in the middle of both of my palms their was a flame in each.

Then as my eyes changed so did what I possessed in my hands. The bottom of my hair turned deep blue and my eyes looked like waves instead of flames. Where the flames had been in my hands were now big drops of water. It looked never ending and I told Lily to touch it. She got nervous but I told her not to be afraid. It wouldn't hurt her unless I wanted it to. So she tentavely placed her finger in the water in my left hand.

"It's WET!!" she exclaimed! "Of course it is, it's water." I told her. As I looked back down my body changed right in front of them. I turned back in to the plain Terry Gray, instead of the magnificent Saralina White...

"Well I think you are pretty amazing but I do see why you have to hide yourself." Remus stated. As I yawned really big, they both grinned. "I think maybe it's time for you to rest for a bit." Lily said with a smile.

That heavy burdening ache in my chest was relieved and I slept for the remainder of the trip. When the train stopped with a jolt I was awoken from my deep slumber. I was seeing stars and I had a crick in my neck but i was sooo excited!!! Finally coming to Hogwarts after all of these years was really doing something for my optimism. I went to grab my trunk but I was stopped by Remus who told me that someone would take care of that for me seeing as I was new...he said it would most likely make the boat sink. I laughed.

"Boat? You are kidding me right?" I snickered but he just looked at me...

"You are new and haven't been sorted yet so i would say...yes boat" he patronized me!! Oh the nerve!! Ha, just kidding. I think if i was in his place i would most likely do the same thing. As we were all exiting the train I got a glimpse of Black (or snuffles i have decided to call him[the name of his childhood stuffed animal]) No one would know the significance of course but he would. I don't know if he would realize though if I called him that where I got the reference from. Should I? I really want to sooo bad. Maybe later.

So I started walking with the mass of midgets and they seemed to be filing towards this giant mountain like thing. I got really close to it and then kind of...screamed when the thing started bellowing for first years. "The thing" looked down at me and grinned really big like I was some pathetic joke. I gave him the most brave look I could manage and started to stalk away when he asked me what my name was.

"Terry Gray" I stated...I didn't know if he knew who I really was until he winked at me with a twinkle in his eye and said

"Welcome lil lady m'names Hagrid, groundskeeper of Hogwarts nice ta meetcha miss Gray" he winked again and then I laughed. Was I really afraid of this guy? HE seemed like a giant teddy bear if ya ask me. And boy was he giant. So he led me to the boats and told me to get one for myself seeing as I was so big and the other kids were so small. As soon as i got in the boat started to go and it took my by surprise so fast that I almost fell out of it.

"B'careful" Hagrid called to me, "They have a bit of a'kick to 'em"

"Yeah I will keep it in mind" i mumbled.

Anyway, so I was looking down at the water, trying to catch a glimpse of the giant squid. All i was able to see though was one measly tentacle...so I looked up. And the view was breathtaking. Almost everything I had ever thought it would be and more. I marveled at the sight before me before the boats decided to stop and I was flung forward.

As I walked into the castle, I was greeted by a strict looking about mid to late thirty year old witch. "My name is Professor Mcgonnagal and I will be your transfiguration teacher. I am also the head of Gryffindor house so if you are sorted into said house you will abide by what I say and come to me if you have any questions. You will go with the rest of the first years and be sorted in after them. Follow me please."

"Yes mam." I said...just a little sarcastic. You see as a pureblood Goddess I was raised to be nothing but good mannered. It is very hard for me sometimes but I've learned from past experiences that I have to keep my temper and sarcasm in check.

So I started walking in. I started to get a little nervous. I really didn't want to be in Slytherin but with my luck...you never know. That reminds me...I never found out what house all my new buddies were in. Well Potter's obviously in Gryffindor and I've been told that Snuffles is too. So I'm only guessing that all of their friends are in the same house. I looked around and spotted Lucius Malfoy, the Black sisters, and their little posse eyeing me. They seemed puzzled but all of the guys had lust in their leering eyes. Which kind of made me wonder because I wasn't really beautifully gorgeous in this form. It also made me realize that they are absolutely disgusting and want to screw everything in the room with boobs. The the woman Mcgonnagal, called my name. I didnt realize that the whole sorting was over and now everyone is staring at me as I walk up.

So I sit on the chair, and she puts this raggedy old hat on me and then I hear a voice in my head. Yeah yeah I get it, dont you usually? No I don't I am not crazy just special. Anyway so the hat starts talking to me.

_"What's this? You are no Gray, you're a white. A very special one at that. I have been waiting for the day to sort you I hope you realize that._

_Well you have an amazing amount of cunning, and you are very sly but not selfish enough to be placed into Slytherin. _

_You are also very brilliant but work and your mind are not your first priority._

_You are very loyal and kind, but much too brave to let that go to waste. So I think I know just the house for you."_

_GRYFFINDOR!!!! _the hat shouted and there was a burst of cheers from the table on the left so I think I'm supposed to join that table.

**SB POV**

Wow. That boring plain girl is in Gryffindor? I thought for sure she would be in Hufflepuff. Well or Ravenclaw but she looked just like the boring riffraff in HufflePuff. Well not all of them are boring. A bunch of the girls can be QUITE entertaining if you know what i mean. Ha well I guess I'm going to have to make short work of this one. The way she seemes so hurt after I talked to her...maybe she likes me? who am I kidding...of course she does! Who doesn't? Well besides Lily and Rose because they don't count. They are boring anyway. She seems to have a little spark in her though....what was her name? Tiffany? Taylor? Wait...Terry! That was it. These girls are stupid anyway. You would think they would realize that I'm not up for a real relationship when I ask them for a snog. Damn, some of THEM ask me for a snog.

There was ever only one girl I ever wanted and I haven't seen her in five years...probably won't ever see her again. You see her name was Saralina and she was the love of my life. I'm pretty sure the only reason I use these girls is to get her off of my mind. I started this whole thing when I was twelve, and I've been with a lot of these girls. A few of them were older than me. No one could ever compare to her though. She wasn't just beauty, she was everything, my whole world. I've never loved anyone the way I loved her, still do actually. I don't think I ever will either but I probably won't ever see her again. Maybe I will be lucky and we will work together. Of course I don't know if her mom has changed her yet. Well her dad really, her mom loved the idea of her getting out of this madness. I think that this summer I will track her down. Maybe over Christmas seeing as we are going back to the Potter Mansion.

You see I moved into the Potter Mansion the summer before fifth year. My house was hell. And even more so that I never got to see her face but I would have reminders of our old life together everywhere I went in my own house. Pathetic isn't it. I mean yeah I pick gorgeous girls for my, what should I call them...night time sessions..? None of them compare though, I must admit I've had to stop myself from calling her name a few times during. Afterwards girls with names that start with S or R, I tend to call her name. The understand of course they always do...sometimes I get girls that look like her and I most of the time imagine the girls as the love of my life and not some random skank I picked up at school.

Well either way she's not up to my usual standards but hey she has quite a bit of spunk so maybe...Well here goes nothing...

"Hey congrats Terry." I said in my most charming voice.

"...thanks..." she said kind of timidly I guess...yep totally digs me.

"No problem babe. So anyway I was wondering since you've never been to hogsmeade if maybe you would like to let me show you a good time...if you know what I mean..." I couldn't resist raising my eyebrows at her suggestively. That used to make Rali [pronounced Rah Lee] mad but it usually turns these girls on.

"So, you think waggling your stupid eyebrows at me is gonna make me want to jump you? Are you insane? I would rather cut off my fingers one by one and then try to sew them back on before I EVER let you show me a "good time" Black." What the HELL?!?! Who does this girl think she is?!?! She just turned ME down. ME!!! I don't think so.

"Well all I wanted was an easy lay anyway so whatever bitch" I said...she should know what I really wanted.

"How could I ever expect any more?"

**so what do you think? I know he seems kind of self absorbed but he has been chased by almost every single girl at school so that usually gives guys enlarged heads. I NEED reviews people I mean I know it hasn't exactly gotten juicy yet but I love writing this story so far. It's also my first one though...any suggestions? Questions? Comments? Let me know...**


	5. Chapter 5

**well everyone...the fifth chapter...i still don't have any reviews even though i have like thirty visitors. i love people that read but i love them even more when they review so i know what they think...maybe give me some ideas? how early in the story should he find out who she is...? im getting kind of irritated because im making this up chapter by chapter and i'm not sure how or when he should figure it out...so any ideas? help me...?!**

**Chapter five- The Pureblood brigade**

**SW POV**

Are you kidding me?? He thinks those lame pick up lines can work on me? I don't think so... I mean I understand he doesn't know who I am but honestly? I am surprised he even gets laid with those kind of lines. Yeah he's gorgeous, but come on girls!! Keep a standard for your selves. So anyway he looked at me kind of irritated, and told me he only wanted a quick lay anyway...then there was a huge awkward silence until the new love of my life decided to be a doll and break it.

"Hey, Terry? Dumbledore said there was going to be a Halloween Dance...any ideas on what you want to be?" Rose asked me.

"Um...no, but I'm pretty sure I can think of something before then you know it IS about two months away" I said smiling at her..."Wait you know what actually now that you mention it, I already think I know of one.." and I did in fact have one in mind and it was definantly a good one.

"Well are you going to tell us?" Remus asked looking a little intrigued.

"Why would I tell you and ruin the surprise...but you and Lily already know what I want to be I bet you a million galleons" I grinned.

"Galleons? Where would you get a million galleons anyway you little filthy mudblood" Lucius Malfoy himself sneered at me like I was the dirt on their shoes...wow this is PRICELESS!!! I look at Remus and Lily and see them trying to stifle their laughter.

"Wow. You have no idea who I am so why don't you take your buddies and your little idiotic brain and get out of my sight before I puke." I was starting to get angry and that DEFINANTLY wasn't a good idea. Just one slip and I would start throwing fire....literally... tee hee wonder what they would say.

"If anyone is in danger of puking...that would be us. From looking at these mudbloods, blood traitors, and" he scowled at Remus "half breeds" The other ones in the group grinned sinisterly at us.

Now I was PISSED!!! I looked at Remus and he looked around to make sure no one heard what they had said. People were paying attention but no one seemed to hear what they had said. So I stood up really fast, got right up in his face and did one of the most dangerous things I will EVER do in my life. I flashed my real appearance so only he and those who were behind him could tell who I was.

"Holy SHIT!" he exclaimed looking completely terrified for the first time since he showed up at our table. You see the purebloods treat me and my mother like royalty seeing as they know about our true identity. Being treated like royalty by pureblood scum is a HUGE deal. Trust me, I would know. He bowed to my once and said in a tone only I and the others behind him could hear. "I'm sorry your highness, your father told my father you would be coming to school this year but I had no idea it would be undercover. Are you trying to infiltrate the blood traitors and mudbloods?" He asked. You see my mother told me to pretend like I was like all of the rest of them so I would never be a target. Some of them, like Narcissa for instance, knew of my true allegiance but she was one of my closest friends just as Sirius was when we were little. She never liked hating muggleborns and was glad Andromeda got out of it but she was too much of a coward to do it herself. So she just pretended to be one of them while every one of the others who thought the pureblood way of life was wrong rebelled. Some of them thought of her as a traitor, but I could see where she was coming from. She didn't just fear for her status or inheritance, but for her life as well as the acceptance of her family. I know how it feels wanting the acceptance of your family. Well it looks like it's my turn to show the real me...

"No, but if you decide to insult any of my friends in front of me you will be very sorry. Do I make myself clear Malfoy?" I asked a threatening tone underlying my monotonous words. At the word "friends" his head jerked up and he got a calculating look on his face. He is also totally in love with me. He wanted to marry me but the Blacks wanted him for Cissy. She wasn't too pleased about that but at least their kids will look gorgeous.

"Crystal my love" he simpered. Then he slowly led his posse back towards their table as I went back to eating feeling their eyes on me every once in a while. Looking around the table I took in everyone's expressions. They must have heard some of the conversation but not all of it. James looked astonished, Remus looked justified, Lily looked like she was trying to hold in laughter, Rose looked intrigued, Karissa looked disappointed, Peter (their ratty looking friend) looked blank, and Sirius was the most puzzling, him being one of the ones sitting closer to me heard alot it seems and he looked calculating. Then he looked at me somewhat disbelieving and then intrigue flashed in his eyes as he smirked at me.

"That was bloody BRILLIANT!" James bellowed excitedly. "How did you DO that?!? Can you do that all of the time?" he seemed eager so I just smiled and nodded.

"It's all a test of wills." I told him "Mine was stronger so they backed down" I looked towards Sirius and he just smirked once more. Then turned towards his dessert. I looked at everyone. "So do you always have run ins with the "Pureblood Brigade"?" I asked a little dry humor slipping into my voice. Everyone at our side of the table laughed and then launched into a bunch of stories of the Slytherins forementioned. All of a sudden I felt a tap on my shoulder.

**SB POV**

Wow. That sure was something. She just sent them away like they were nothing. How did she do that? As soon as she stood up in his face the confidence on it flashed and melted into fear and admiration. What did she say....how did she get that to happen? "_My love"_? Why did he call her that when she is a muggleborn. And "_Your highness"_? And what about that bow? Something isn't right with her and I intend to find out what. Her personality and confidence doesn't suit her outward appearance. She has the attitude of a pureblood gone wrong, like me. And they asked if she was going to "_infiltrate us_"? He also said she was "_undercover_". She isn't who she claims and I'm gonna figure out who she is if it's the last thing I do. So I tapped her on the shoulder.

"I know this isn't the real you and I will find out who or what you are. Mark my words."

**So Love it? Hate it? let me know...I need feedback good bad whatever. taken as constructive critisicm...promise! I just need it please? Need to know what you think because right now i have no idea where to go with this and i would very readilly welcome help. or ideas :) love yall that read this**

**so review away!! :p**


	6. Chapter 6

**okay i got a review!!! thank you marypoppinscollar it means alot! Positive or negative feedback means alot....just help me out yall im trying... im kind of stuck right now so if any of you have any ideas let me know!...ONWARD!**

**I only own what you don't recognize..the rest is rowlings**

**Chapter 6- After the feast...**

So after me and Sirius had that fantastic conversation I got to thinking...what if he really does figure it out. I mean I want him to dont get me wrong but what if he tells someone. I would probably die if he had betrayed my trust like that. I can't have people knowing who I am. Especially those close to Voldemort. Even though he is a huge player I'm still in love with him and he is still considered to me my best friend. You know what they say, you never stop loving your first love. So as we walked out of the Great Hall I got to thinking...should I help him? Or should I make this as hard on him as possible? I don't know I kind of want to mess with him a bit! see where it takes me. So Im just walking up the third flight of stairs when I stop and realize I have NO IDEA where Im going. So I look and look for any clues or anything to give me some sense of where I am when i hear footsteps and voices from behind me.

"Sirius I don't know why you are so against this new girl. She seems nice." im guessing that's Potter.

"Yeah Sirius I mean you were the one that was rude not her." Ahh there goes Remus, he's my favorite.

"There's just something about that girl guys. I'm telling you she's not normal. She thinks she cool and the shit but she doesn't stand out for nothing. What gave her that sense of security? Who is she even? Where does she come from?" and Black of course...what about their little mousey friend?

So I hide behind this little cove looking thing in the wall listening to their conversation and hearing their ludicrous ideas about who I am....its kind of hilarious listening to their assumptions and guesses.

"Hey what if shes like a spy from Bulgaria or Romania hidden in the many groups of children at Hogwarts!!" "Maybe she's a vampire hiding from Voldemort!" "Maybe she's a vampire hiding FOR Voldemort!" "Maybe shes a transfigured mountain troll"

What the hell?! How do they come up with this stuff? I need to get some friends...maybe they can shield me from this utter stupidity. Im pretty sure Remus is the one stating the outlandish ones him being the only one that knows the real me. Well besides Sirius...well you know what I mean.

"What if she's an Entity?" Yeah everyone knows of the stories and myths of the Gods. Thats another reason Im in hiding. I look at Remus to see what his reaction to Potter's suggestion is and his eyes are practically popping out of his head...maybe I should save him for this one.

"Yeah Im sure its that one..." I sneer as I step out of the cove. They all jumped and Potter let out a little girly shriek! I like him, he's fun maybe i should befriend him. "I mean just look at her she is kind of hideous and plain and boring am i right Sirius?" I smiled albeit a little mockingly at him. He used to hate that I wonder if he still does.

"You know what bitch? Just because you think you are the shit doesn't mean you can stalk around us like a sniveling slytherin trying to scare and intimidate us because its not going to work." Yep still bothers him!

"Oh like it didn't just work? Maybe you need to rethink this position of trying to find out who I am...you won't be able to do it on your own." Maybe that was a little too much advice but he needs to understand that he shouldn't mess with me. I lean up really close to him and smirk a little...this is going to hurt, and not just me "Plus the only ones who know who I really am are people you usually wouldn't associate with. Three guesses who!" I mocked him...

"Now would any of you like to show me where the common room is? I am completely lost right now and without guidance I might run into the scary pureblood brigade!!!" Remus looked at me and laughed...hard...he has a nice laugh its kind of gravelly but strong...like him i guess.

"Well good luck finding someone to show you around this castle! No one around here should be seen with you." Wow now that stung what a jackass...why is he like this now?

"Here come with me Terry, I'll show you the way I was headed up there anyway so why leave you stranded?" Another reason Remus is the best!!! He will do whats right even if his friends dont like it. He is wonderful! Why couldn't i fall in love with him? He seems to accept me more than Sirius. Sigh, oh well I guess things just aren't meant to be like that. Im supposed to fall in love with a superficial, self centered, retarded jerk. Oh well I can try to get over it...

"Okay I would be delighted thank you Remus..no wonder why you are my favorite!"

"That's betrayal Remus! Why would you be with her and against us? We are your best friends Remus!!! Who stuck with you through your furry little problem? Who was always around you when you are in one of your moods? Who sticks up for you when the slytherins talk shit? We do!! You are going to leave us for her?!!?!?"

"Yeah really mature Sirius! You are supposed to be sixteen why don't you act like it? On second thought just go away Snuffles we have better things to do than listen to you piss and moan about how your friend is a decent human being!" SHIT!!! I really hope he didn't catch that, crap crap crap how could i let that slip?!?!? Life is so cruel to me. Why is he looking at me like that, no you no what I think he caught it....oops...

"What did you call me?" he hissed at me his voice deadly soft.

"I called you Sirius what you need to get your ears checked?" I really hope he believes my bluff...please if there is a God in Heaven let him believe me!!!!

"No, you didn't call me Sirius...you called me Snuffles, one can only be curious where you heard that name?" He's on to me...oh no...what do I say what do I say?!??!

"I just...umm..." SHIT!

"You just...umm...what? Made it up? Please, you couldn't have...unless you know....? No you couldn't have, she's...gone...she doesn't live here anymore..." he looked at me suspiciously, "unless, no...just...no...where do you come from?" his eyes had some contemplative look to him, and then suspicion completely dominated his face.

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**Well this is just another chapter, sorry its been so long but im in a little bit of a rut....and i was away from a computer for a while...but now im back and getting alot of new ideas for this story, but i would LOVE reviews and critisicm is appreciated!!**


	7. Chapter 7

well thank you for the reviews and please feel free to keep them coming...to answer some of your questions, yes saralina can control everything all four elements and then some other things...i will get to that later in the story, and it will still be a few chapters until sirius figures out who she is so its still going to take a little while

in this chapter we are going to meet regulas and saralina has a conversation with one of her old friends..and some old feelings are unearthed so stay tuned!!!

i do not own anything that you recognize, it all belings to jo rowling..grr

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_recap: "I just...umm..." SHIT!_

_"You just...umm...what? Made it up? Please, you couldn't have...unless you know....? No you couldn't have, she's...gone...she doesn't live here anymore..." he looked at me suspiciously, "unless, no...just...no...where do you come from?" his eyes had some contemplative look to him, and then suspicion completely dominated his face._

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Chapter 7- The Run in

"Me? Where do I come from? I'm muggleborn I come from America...duh what you can't tell from my "accent" , crap crap crap i really hope he buys that.

"But then why did you call me Snuffles? Where did you hear that from? Because I know for a fact, you didn't make it up." he sneered at me.

"Oh yeah buddy? How could you know that? You dont know me I could have made it up!" ha take that jerk face! because ha i kind of did make it up, i named his stuffed animal dog that...funny.

"Yeah and I'm the Queen of England."

"Are you really? Well excuse me your majesty but I must be going to bed now I bid you good day!" I beamed at him, curtsied, and grabbed Remus by the arm and took off down the corridor Remus laughing and Potter's laugh ringing through the halls.

"She got you Pads"

"Shut up Prongs"

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"That was close!" I breathed trying to catch my breath while Remus just stood there looking amused and not the least bit tired...stupid werewolf.

"Well, well, well who do we have here?" shit i know that voice....not one i want to hear right now. God from one Black to another...

"Regulas, how've you been?" trying to sound nonchalant. Have they told him who i am yet?

"How about you don't talk to me like you know me mudblood?" and apparently not...hmm...should I have some fun with him? Sure why not. You see Regulas had THE biggest crush on me when we were little but he knew me and Sirius were in love so he settled for just being my friend. He was a great friend, never judged me for my opinion on muggleborns or anything not pureblood. He accepted me for who I was and never tried to change my opinion. Honestly I think he was in the same boat as me. Metophorically of course. He likes muggleborns and normal people but he needs to hide that. His older brother turned his back on their family and now its up to him to save face in front of the other pureblood families so I feel kind of bad for him. I hope they haven't stunted him though and brainwashed him. He was one of my favorites. I really wished he would be able to get out of this. Well here goes nothing.

"Remus, do you think you could excuse us? I need to speak with him alone." At first he was hesitant but Im sure he could see the desperation in my eyes and he slowly nodded.

"Of course whatever you need. I'll be waiting for you in the common room so me and Lily can show you around." He gave me the basic directions to the common room and then made his way there.

"So mudblood, why did you need to talk to me? Do I need my wand out for this talk?"

"Funny, Reggie I thought you of all people would realize who I was but your brother didn't either so maybe I put too much faith in the Black family brothers."

"You, just called me Reggie...?"

"Hmm, I did, didn't I? A little slow on the uptake today huh Reggie? What does that tell you." I said with a sarcastic smile.

"Lina? Is, is that really you?" he stuttered a little over his words.

"In the flesh! Well kind of ha" I smiled softly, I always thought it was endearing that when he got nervous or excited about something he would stutter a little. He was so sweet...I wonder what they did to him.

"LINA!!! Oh i've missed you soooo much! Nothing has been the same without you! Sirius is even MORE of an asshole...Cissy is changing little by little to accommadate them more and Bellatrix is just as much of a bitch as she's always been! Did you know Bella's betrothed to Rodolphus? Cissy is almost engaged to Lucius, he even bought the ring and everything, and did you know that Sirius ran away from home? Everything has changed since you left..." he kept prattling on about the pureblood scene but one thing stuck out in my mind...

"Sirius ran away from home?" I cut in.

"Oh yeah after he got into Gryffindor, which I'm sure you've heard about, mom and dad would beat him merciliously almost every day of the summer and every time he came home for holiday. Then during Christmas last year he got fed up and almost blew up half of the house with the fight him and mom had. After that he packed his things and went to the Potters." he looked a little skittish saying this to me, but I didn't understand until something clicked.

"Well where were you while all of this was going on? Surely you wouldn't be such a coward and you would help him I mean he IS your only brother and he ALWAYS no matter what the consequence would stick up for you." my voice was deadly soft and laced with acid.

"About that...well you know I can't get on mom's bad side I'm all she has left after him ya know? Please don't hate me Lina. You know how I feel about you and I don't mind if you aren't with me but it would kill me if you hated me" he looked at me a kind of lost puppy look on his face. God I could never hate a face like that.

"Reggie I don't hate you, but what the hell...you promised to always stick by our side and now your, your one of them? I don't know if I can take it."

"I know, but I'm NOT one of them no matter how badly they want me to be. But I have to go along with it, you know how much i love mum and I can't bear to hurt her or my family."

"Regulas Arcturus Black maybe it's slipped your mind but Sirius is part of that family no matter how badly you wish differently. Now if you will excuse me I must be going." I turned on my heel and made my way to my common room leaving him drowning in his thoughts and I couldn't help but think that this one time...just this once...he was too far gone for me to save him.

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So what do yall think of my Regulas huh? I know alot of people think he should be evil but for those of you that have read the seventh book you should know even though he didn't like muggleborns he was still a kind hearted soft kid. The next one should be up some time soon but for now reviews would be appreciated!! :)


	8. Chapter 8

hey there...chapter eight is up! thank you to those who have reviewed (you know who you are) and for those who haven't...well thank you for reading :) i dont know how well chapter eight is going to be but it should be okay considering on how good its been so far...this one im kind of playing by ear....i had a bunch of great ideas but they disappeared when i went to write them down but i know for sure you are going to be able to saralina work some of her magic...i am aware that i use that name alot but you have to remember that until she is found out she is going by Terry....so here goes nothing!!!

i own nothing....its all rowlings

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**Chapter 8- The Many Talented Malfoy**

So after I was walking through the corridor thinking I was not going to have any more surprises tonight low and behold...

"Well hello there darling"

God how I had hoped I wouldn't have to hear that voice again for a while. It seems tonight is my lucky night.

"Hi there! What did you need from me? Another reason to keep your mouth shut?"

"No, no what I need from you is something you have very adamantly refused though one could only be curious as to why? I am wealthy, intelligent, ridiculously handsome, what's not to like? It seems dear Narcissa hasn't been able to resist it...why have you I wonder?" Oh yeah its really hard not to realize why I don't want to sleep with you douche bag. Trying to move in on me while he is almost engaged to Cissy.

"Why are you speaking to me about this Lucius? You have Cissy, what more could you want? She is the epitome of grace and wealth and beauty, what's not to like?" Why does he keep looking at me like that? It's sooooo creepy.

"Well let's see...why would I want you over her? You are the complete match for me. You are beautiful, charming, pureblood, intelligent, independent, and well let's not forget that little detail about how you are so...what word shall we use for it...powerful? No, gifted? No doesn't fit...how about Godly? Oh I like that one it works for me." he chuckled oily at me and leered with those piercing grey eyes. But they aren't silvery like Sirius' no they are filled with malice and greed. It's not a very welcoming sight right now, well ever really.

"Ha funny, but what would you have that I would want? You are smart I will give you that. But you are greedy, power hungry, malevolent, uninteresting, mind numbingly dull and unbelievable irritating. Plus, I thought I had made it clear that I have muggleborn friends in Gryffindor?" Take that you slimy bastard.

"Well you did. But that could be easily rearranged. You only have a lapse in judgement. It's you first taste of freedom. You've been locked up in that hole of a house. Yes it's spacious, attractive, flashy, but it doesn't help you learn social skills. You couldn't have known that as soon as you got your taste of freedom you would have to share a house with filth, vermin, half breeds and mudbloods that aren't fit to lick the mud off your shoes." Now that pissed me off. I know he is goading me into showing my true colors. He's good at it too, because guess what I am about to do?

"That's ENOUGH! You have NO right to say you are better than them! You are nothing, you deserve nothing, and you will get NOTHING from me do you understand?!?!? They are amazing people and talented witches and wizards. In fact, you should be THANKING them for letting you stay in this school, much less alive." Okay a little more information then I was supposed to be sharing. Damn I just gave him everything he wanted to know....shit...

"Wow, do you really think I give a shit who you are friends with? I'm just glad I know how much of a sell out you really are blood traitor. But you know what? You still are gorgeous, even if you are a blood traitor. Everything about you screams perfect. So why don't you show me some perfection."

Shit he has me cornered what am I gonna do. I really don't want to get into a fight right about now. It's well, it's not good for me to fight on the first day of school. Maybe if he wasn't such an asshole I wouldn't have to fight now would I?

"Now now Lucius, you don't want to rile me up do you? I don't need it right now especially in this less than fair fight..."

"Don't worry I will go easy on you, after all you are a woman, even as talented as you are, you are still a woman" God does he really have the NERVE to go all sexist on ME?!?

"How thoughtful, but Lucius I wasn't concerned with me, more worried..."

"Worried about me? I'm flattered"

"No, not you, about what will happen to these corridor walls when I tear you apart."

"Lets see what you can do then, shall we? Scared? Well maybe you should be I am a man of many talents" he pulled out his wand, slowly, the cocky bastard. Does he really think he can take me on?

"Many talents? Like what? How good you are at seducing? Yeah it's really worked with me I just can't keep my hands off of you. Plus you and your scary long girly hair how do you get it like that? That's talent!" Well that pissed him off and the fight has officially started. So he throws the first curse at me. A cruciatus? This early in the game? Well now that is heavy duty stuff...and I catch it with one hand. He freaks of course as I throw his curse back at him in a ball of red light. He dodges it by an inch and comes back at me with another one. Well I'm not quite sure what this one is. One of his idiotic lackies probably made it up. Well maybe Snape. He always seemed like the sneaky clever type. Unlike those goons that try to be smart but end up looking stupid. OW shit what the hell?!?!?!

"Hurts doesn't it bitch? Severus made it, remember him? Every once in a while he would come to one of our parties. He's a genius with curses. You can just feel all of them can't you? They hurt like nothing you've ever felt previously. Try to stop them!" He looked at me triumphantly. "Of course you don't know the countercurse but I can give it to you. For a price."

"So blackmail and bribery is how you get your kicks? Smart really, talented" and just as I finished that one sentence the huge gashes that were in my skin started to heal. Like I said, goddesses heal fast. No matter what magic, they heal.

"Told you so..." He was looking down of course at his wand as he twirled it. As he looked at me his eyes got wide, and his jaw dropped when I stood to my full height in all my goddess glory. Not just my magic but my looks had surfaced when I healed myself. I looked at him and my eyes turned completely silver as did the white layer of my hair. I raised my hands to him and threw them out across stretching them towards the walls of the corridor. He went flying back towards the wall at the end, and stopped short of the wall hanging in the air as I walked up to him.

"But apparently your talents are for nothing" and I squeezed my hands into fists and turned away as he slowly turned blue from lack of oxygen. "Don't ever say I didn't warn you not to mess with me" I said as I walked away and as soon as I turned the corner and turned myself back into Terry Gray I a huge gasp of air from where I had just come.

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So what did yall think? Her first real show of her magic. That was air in case you didn't pick up on it. I know silver doesn't really fit but the bottom layer of her hair was already white so it doesn't really fit much. Well if you liked it let me know if you didn't let me know. I don't know if I really like the direction this story is going in so I might stop writing. Unless I have some huge breakthrough or just some ideas...any suggestions?


	9. Chapter 9

okay so this one is kind of a filler chapter. Sirius gets closer to finding out the truth also a glimpse into Sirius' head. How he feels about her and how he feels about Terry. Also a minor run-in with Bella and Rudolphus. I know yall are waiting for a big new extravagant chapter, but this one is just showing how they got the mirrors and how he is still trying to figure out Terry, is he starting to have feelings for her? Or does he just want to figure out the puzzle?

And okay guys I'm really starting to doubt my writing skills...I don't know who all is interested in this story but its making me kind of sad :'( so if anyone can think of anything to say to me about the story, good or bad, anything will be appreciated.

I dont own any of this!!!

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How Time Flies!

Wow, I am so glad tonight is over...was that action packed or what? Gosh first Sirius at the beginning, then Regulas (which honestly wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't pissing me off) and then to TOP IT ALL OFF, I get to see that lovely git, Malfoy, who just so happens to know the biggest secret in the HISTORY of big secrets...

Damn, what am I going to do? I could just play it off like he's an idiot if he ever brings it up. Or maybe I can threaten his life? Or just kill him...no...that wouldn't go over too well with Dumbledore. But that ass deserves it! He can't just get away with this crap! Luring me into a corner and then trying to take advantage of me in my most vulnerable state. Well technically I'm not very vulnerable, but you get what I mean! He's so irritating!!! I can't stand him or his loser friends and I know that wasn't the last I was going to see of him. He was just going to make sure I was horribly incapacitated by the time he tried to get me on his own. He really needs to get a life and stop trying to interfere in other people's. Oh well! Wow, I think the only good thing about tonight is that I found my way to the common room without getting lost. I am so talented huh...? (Note the sarcasm) So the portrait is some, uh, well lets just say robust woman, in a hideous pink dress with ruffles. I would say the only good thing about her is her cheery demeanor. She seems a lush of sorts with her friend Violet and their rum chocolates.

"Excuse me *hic* dear, was there something you *hic* needed?" she struggled through her words as she tried to get my attention. Not trying to be rude but honestly all I could do was stand there in awe of her presence and the fact that she is an entrance to one of the main common rooms, the one with a very dangerous enemy I might add, and she's getting drunk with another woman from another portrait? What if I was some kind of intruder that had somehow gotten hold of the password and she didn't even notice that she didn't recognize me!?

That's when I realized that I had never gotten the password from Remus. Even if I did though I wouldn't have remembered it, what with the run in with Malfoy and all that. So I tried my best to bullshit her and see if she would fall for it due to her...rather...intoxicated state.

"I am new here, I was just put into Gryffindor this evening and I was never told the password so do you think you could let me in anyway?" I gave her my best suck up grin, hoping she wouldn't catch on to the fact that she didn't have any idea who I was.

"Well I'm sorry miss *hic* whatever your name is, but I can not let you in without the password my dear." she looked at me with her bleary, bloodshot eyes with pity. Shit well there goes that plan. Hmm what if I just started pounding on the portrait to see if anyone would open it? I don't think she would take to kindly to that tough so maybe not.

Wait a minute! I totally forgot! I don't know if he would go for it though. Seeing as he doesn't know who I am. Even if I do turn back he would get freaked out if I told him to let me into the common room. Oh well, I might as well try seeing as I have no other alternative. You see, when Sirius and I were little we went to this store together to get him something for his birthday. Well I had my allowance and everything so I decided to spend it all on him. We were walking through one of the thrift stores in Diagon Alley (those were his favorites, sometimes we would find muggle things in there and he loved them) when we stumbled across four mirrors in a wrapping on the shelf. They were together and as we read the paper that explained what they were. Apparently they were communicating mirrors and when you spoke the name of the person who owned one of the others then their face appears in the mirror and you can talk to them through it. I know it's silly but we used to talk through them all of the time, even after he left for school. So I was thinking maybe if I made myself have my old silhouette and disguised myself in shadow so he couldn't completely see me he would come open the portrait door.

I know it sounded far fetched but it's the only chance I have and I can't think of anything else that will help me. I know that once he opens it and sees Terry he will try to close it, but even in this form I can still use my powers which I know for a fact are stronger than his. So here goes nothing. As I pulled out my mirror I thought how pathetic it was that even though I never talk to him anymore I still carry my mirror everywhere I go out of some kind of insane hope that he will think about me and try to talk to me...even though it has been almost six years I still sometimes wish he would or think I hear him calling from it, but everytime I get it out, it is completely empty. Maybe I'm psycho or just trying to hold onto a dream I should have realized died along time ago.

Here we go. I look into the mirror and say his name as softly as I can. "Sirius Black" I wait a few minutes and "Sirius Black" I say a little louder. Please God let him somehow hear me. And then I scream into it. "SIRIUS BLACK!"

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SB POV

Sleep could not have come fast enough. I lay here awake for as long as I possibly could thinking about the day and the unexpected guest we got in the house of Godric Gryffindor. Really I'm so frustrated with this girl. I have no idea who she is but I know I want to find her out. She is so different from anyone I have ever met. Well not anyone, there is one person, but I probably won't ever see her again. She's shy, but fiesty, soft, but hard. She is also the only girl (besides Evans and Rose) who have never fawned after me as soon as they met me. Terry Gray is an enigma, and I know the last thought I had of her as I drifted to sleep was that I was going to try my hardest to figure her out.

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(Two Hours Later)

"Sirius Black...Sirius Black...SIRIUS BLACK!!" Crap! I shoot up drenched in sweat from my nightmare, the last time I saw Rali. What is that...where is it coming from? Someone's calling my name, but who? The voice sounds so familiar. Wait...I know who that is!!! I jump up but get all tangled in my sheets and roll around on the floor for a few minutes. After I finally got myself untangled I booked it over to my trunk and pulled out the mirror SHE gave me so long ago. I remember the exact day as well...this was long after she stole my heart though.

"Hello? Who's there?" I paused for a minute..."Saralina?" Please, please, please don't let it just be wishful thinking...

"Go open the portrait hole!" Maybe...maybe she's out there!! Damn! I better hurry...I run out slamming the door behind me knowing the boys in our dorm sleep like rocks, well it might have woken Moony but he goes right back to sleep.

"I'm coming! Just don't leave!" I practically sob into the mirror. I know I probably sound like a wuss, but right now I just need to get to her, the love of my life. I don't really give a crap how I sound.

"Help her! She's in trouble!" Who? Who is in trouble? Now I'm confused... "Trixy! And Rudolph! They are getting her." Ha only we would dare to call them those names! It must really be her. I sprint to the portrait and fling it open ready to see those beautiful eyes that have haunted my dreams for nearly six years...

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SW POV

"Well, well is it really you? My you've changed...and not in a good way either." dang it, just my luck. I mean really? I'm pretty sure I have him coming for me and they find me right at the time I'm about to go in.

"I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about." God I hope they buy it. No, they won't I just remembered what I did at the Feast.

"Oh I'm sure you don't Lina. Or should we call you Rali?" Damn it... of course they know....well at least I still have my powers.

"Don't you DARE call me that name! You have no right." As I yell at her she throws a curse at me that rips open my arm and blood flows everywhere.

"Don't even TRY to talk to me like that bitch! But, how could I forget. My dear cousin keeps the rights to that name. You have talked to him recently right? You know what he is now. A blood traitor, a player, he uses those girls you know. Let's just say you aren't the only one on his mind anymore. What was that five, six years ago? And now you are in Gryffindor? Did he change your ways as well as his?"

"Well my dear Trixy, I think it's time you know the truth." I stood up showing my real self again. "He wasn't the one who changed my views." My eyes turned gray and I threw them back into the walls as I got right up to Bellatrix's face. "I changed his..." Crap is that the portrait opening?!?! As they slowly lost conciousness I turned back into Terry watching them fall to the floor as the portrait hole opened....

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SB POV

As the portrait hole opens I heard a familiar voice only more mature than the last time I had heard that wonderful sound, but when I looked around all I saw were Trixy, Rudolph, and Gray. The odd thing was that they didn't have Gray, she had them passing out against the wall. I don't know how she did it, but she did and it was astounding. The sad part is I didn't see Rali anywhere. Slowly though I saw Gray sinking a little with every step she took. That's when I noticed the blood.

"What the hell happened to you Gray? You're bleeding like you were attacked by an animal." It was true her whole arm was covered in blood so I'm guessing that's where the injury was and on the ground a puddle of blood was rapidly spreading.

"Just a little cut Black you know the usual. Nothing I can't handle." Even as she said that though she swayed on her feet and I ran to catch her before she did even more damage to herself. Yes I know I don't like her but I am still a somewhat decent human being and know how to take care of people. I've been in enough rough spots when to know that someone needs help.

"Why are you helping me? I was under the impression I wasn't worthy." Damn I don't hate her. I mean I know I came off as an ass hole but that doesn't mean I hate her. I had just heard that there was a new girl coming to Hogwarts and I was kind of hoping it was someone who meant something to me. Then she came into our compartment so I knew she was the new girl and I was angry it wasn't who I thought it was. Well that makes me kind of glad now, because if it was her and she walked in on me and Karissa she wouldn't had ever willingly talked to me again.

"That's not it I was just a little angry that you weren't....you know what nevermind, do you want my help or not." I don't need to go spilling my heart out to this complete stranger. Who does she think she is?

"I'm sorry I would love some help. It would be very kind of you."

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Okay so that chapter seemed okay so far...the next one will be a couple weeks later in the story that shows a flash back of the conversation they have while sirius is fixing up her arm, and it's also one of Remus's nights...and then possible halloween, but that might be the chapter after it...

reviews are my friends... :)


	10. Chapter 10

alright finally a chapter ten! Are yall sticking with me so far? Sorry I was hoping I would be getting these chapters out pretty fast because I hate it when I have to wait forever for a chapter but I have school and such and I'm gone for a while during the day so I don't really have that much time. Also I'm running out of ideas so any suggestions or critcism would be wonderful thank you!

And a special shout out to VampricDragoness shes been pretty awesome. Boosting my confidence does amazing things to the ego. Thank you.

Another thing is that we should all take a moment because Farra Fawcett and Michael Jackson both died today. They were both HUGE icons and legends and they will be missed!!!

I don't own anything you recognize!

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Ch 10 Somebody's in Trouble...

Wow! Alot has happened in the past two weeks... everything is different now. It's crazy. So let's start at the beginning shall we?

*FLASHBACK*

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_As we walked into the common room with him practically carrying me, he was staring at me out of the corner of his eyes._

_"What do you need Sirius? Why do you keep staring at me like that?" I asked. I mean I really want to know, it's weird. He keeps giving me these looks like he's trying to figure out something._

_"Well I'll tell you once we sit down and start patching you up." He's trying to change the subject. I know he is. He's hoping maybe I will be able to forget what I asked him._

_"Okay, but I heal really fast. Something in my genes I guess." I smiled. I really had to be on my guard. If I let something slip in his presence, then anything can tip him off to who I am if he really remembers me like I hope he does. So now we are sitting on the couch by the fire as he tries to raise my sleeve._

_"Terry there's no way I can raise this your shirt might have to come off..." he says with a little blush on his face. Now that, the modesty and sweet demeanor is one of the things I miss the most. He was always so considerate to other people and not one to embarrass them. Now he's just a prick, well, it seems he's not when he's by himself. Or at least helping someone with something like what's wrong with my arm._

_"Well, why don't you just cut off the sleeve? I mean can't you?"_

_"Well I could but, you don't like that shirt?" good point. It is one of my favorites._

_"Alright well hold on. I will on one condition. You don't freak out? Please?" I know my tattoo is hidden, but my scars I couldn't hide. The biggest one is completely covering my back and torso like a tank top. Just not on my arms. It looks like spider webbing but it's from once when the Dark Lord put the cruciatus curse on me for at least twelve hours. I had slapped him and spit in his face...well he was trying to take my power what did you expect me to do?_

_"I promise...but why would I?" he had that cute, curious look on his face. _

_"Oh you'll see, believe me." Well here goes nothing. As I pulled my shirt off I heard a huge gasp from Sirius. That kid is way to caring for his own good. I just hope he doesn't remember when this happened and puts that together because he's the one who helped patch me up after that happened. _

_"Wow, what happened to you? Cruciatus scars? Aren't you muggleborn?" Well, shit, didn't think about that...how do I get out of this one? I guess I have to bullshit my way through this one._

_"Well I lived in America. My family was very prominent there we owned a business, we made lots of money, we were practically famous. It was absolutely insane. Crazies outside our house every day trying to get a piece of us. Well one day someone made it through the gates. We thought damn, what are we supposed to do about that? Then he found his way into the house, even with all the locks we had mind you, and killed my parents with a single wave of his wand. Then he turned to me, he laughed hollowly, "' A muggle? Someone told me someone spectacular lived here and they send me after a muggle?!"' He got so angry he turned his wand on me as I looked at the clock. It was seven at night and as he used that curse on me I stared at the clock until I couldn't see anymore. Until all I felt, heard, saw was pain. When I woke up he was gone. I looked at the clock and saw that is was seven in the morning. I don't know why he let me live, but it hurt so bad. I looked down at myself and blood was everywhere. I called the hospital and told them I was hurt terrible and needed help. They came to get me and freaked out when they saw what had happened to my skin. It looked like someone had thrown me through a metal fence, you know the ones that crisscross and all that? So yeah that's what happened. I was eight." I really hope he believed that load of crap._

_"Oh my goodness. That's absolutely horrible. Do you want to talk about something else?" He looked worried that he might have upset me. Well I'm just going to change the subject, maybe find more about his life since we haven't seen each other in forever. _

_"Can we? I mean I can't think of anything so you can ask me anything, but I would rather not talk about this." Please talk about you, please talk about you!_

_"Well, okay. How many guys have you been with?" Oh my god he wants to talk about that?!?! No, no anything but that. Crap...wait, maybe I can flip this to my advantage._

_"I have only been with one, but he meant the world to me. I could never imagine my life without him, but I haven't seen him in about...five, six years?" Okay that was a huge clue, so sue me I want him to know who I am. So would you...._

_"Only one? Really? I mean you aren't ugly, you're very pretty. Why wouldn't anyone want to be with you?" He says as he cleans my wound._

_"I thought I 'wasn't anything special'?" I ask him. I want him to know that I remember the way he treated me._

_"Yeah I know. I'm so sorry about that. I just, I had heard my family talking about a new girl at school and I just thought that it would be someone that meant something in their society. Someone who means so much to me. I would finally be able to see her." Wow, OH MY GOD!!! He's talking about me!! God, I'm going to explode!!! Well as I squealed in my mind, I nodded my head for him to go on. "So you can imagine my surprise when it was a muggleborn girl, who I never knew and my heart, ripped again. So I guess I just snapped. I'm sorry." Oh my, he misses me as much as I miss him._

_"Then why do you sleep with these girls. Use them, if you miss this girl so much?" That I just had to know...it doesn't make sense._

_"I guess I just get bored. I miss her but there is no way I'm ever going to see her again. So I guess, I'm just trying to find that girl."_

_"They are obviously not anything but looks. They are vapid and stupid, why do you go with girls like that? Because they're beautiful?" I can't believe him...I was never like them and he was with me._

_"It's just they're fun. They aren't boring and it's not like I'm actually going to get with them. they aren't looking for anything special they are just looking for some fun, and that's what I'm here for." You have GOT to be kidding me._

_"You're kidding right? All those girls are to you is fun?! You don't even remember most of their names do you? God why are you like this?! You never used to be. The Sirius I knew..." SHIT!!! DAMMIT WHAT AM I GOING TO DO...OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD!!!!!_

_"What did you just say to me? You know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about me! What, what do you know....that I have shit for family? That I don't like slytherins? That I ran away from home? You..."_

_"When did you run away from home?!?!"_

_"Why is it any of your business? You come here acting like we have known each other forever. You act like you know everything and you have so many missing spots in your history that I don't even know where to begin!" He looks at me with a crazed look in his eye. "You know nothing." And, on that note, he stormed off into the boys dormitory._

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*END OF FLASHBACK*

"So that's what happened to get him in such a state." I was telling Remus what happened because now Sirius won't even be in the same room with me except for classes and even then he doesn't even look at me. "He came storming into the dormitory and layed on his bed thinking we were all asleep and just bawled his eyes out. He did it quietly so none of us would wake up and find him like that but it's like he was just broken. I haven't seen him this broken up since he found out Regulas was a death eater.

"WHAT?!?!?!"

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Okay I know I promised you a halloween and a Remus night but that will happen in the next chapter I promise for real this time!!!

I love this one, so any reviews would be lovely.


	11. Chapter 11

Alright everyone so I don't know who liked that last chapter but i like this one even better...thank you to everyone that reads this story and reviews. This one might be a little long but I have alot to cover in this one. There IS a Remus night. There will be another one in the next chapter in greater detail. There is also the Halloween Ball and a visit from someone we haven't seen yet. Also I know Karissa is a skank, but her, Lily, Alice and Rose were friends for a long time so they are still friends with her even though she is stuck up.

This story belongs to J.K. Rowling I own what you don't recognize.

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Ch. 11- Full Moons and Foul Play

After Remus told me Regulas was a death eater already I did my best to avoid him. I've tried my hardest in so many different ways but he keeps finding me. Of course I don't talk to him for more than like five minutes every time, but he never fails to bring up the fact that he knows I'm avoiding him. I always ask him why he thinks I would EVER avoid him so I think he knows I know. God I can't believe him! How could he do this to us? It's absolutely ridiculous. He was the sweetest kid I knew and now, who knows what he does to those poor muggleborns and muggles they send him after! I wonder what Narcissa thinks about this. I'm going to have to talk to her soon. Somewhere in the near future.

So that's why I am here after a long Transfiguration class of me staring at the insides of my eyelids (I didn't get much sleep last night wondering how I'm going to talk to Cissy about this) I decided to just walk up to her after lunch. So that's why I am walking down the corridor behind her as she talks to Clara, another six year slytherin who has a thing for torturing muggle men. I think she's psycho but her and Cissy have been friends for I can't even remember how long. Finally after what seems like forever Clara decides that she needs to go to class this time. As she leaves Cissy I walk up behind her and pull her with me. She screams a little at first but then she sees who I am and quiets down. That's when I know that Bellatrix, Rudolphus, and Lucius have shared with her who I am. I wonder who else they have told. I mean I already know they told Voldemort. That's to be expected, it's only a matter of time until he sends his lackies after me.

Not long after I was pulling her she starts walking on her own and comes up behind me.

"Where are we going Lina?" she asks. A little timidly but that's what you get with Cissy. Everyone thinks she's just a cold hearted, manipulative bitch, but she's just quiet and shy in general.

"You've heard of the Room of Requirement right?" She nods whispers a little 'of course' and waits for me to finish. "Well I want you to show me where it is. We need to talk privately and we don't need little idiots snooping about and listening to our conversation."

"Okay Lina follow me." She leads me up there with her graceful walk like a model almost but much to shy. Her and her sister are nothing alike really. Her sister is an overbearing, pompous bitch, where she is a kind, quiet, sweet girl. I finished my thoughts as we walked to the door that appeared when she walked by that expanse of wall three times. As we walked in it made me smile. She had made the room look like our old hideout that we used to go to and talk. Where the ones who didn't hate muggleborns in our little social circle would meet that only we knew about. Damn it brought back so many memories. I really missed this. She saw me smile and laughed a little. I looked at her.

"Really Cissy? This room? Wow, it's got a homey feel to it." I laugh and plop down in the chair that looks like mine did in that room. Hers was right next to mine obviously. So she walked over and sat facing me.

"So Lina what did you want to talk about? Sirius possibly?" she arched one of her natural bleach blonde eyebrows.

"No consequently, just wanted to catch up on everything I missed and I wasn't sure who I could do that with." So we got started. I learned that Bella and Rudolphus were set to be married as soon as they graduated. Same with her and Lucius (much to her disdain). Also that Regulas was heartbroken when his big brother ran away due to what he had already told me. Which means he was telling the truth about that.

"There is one more thing that I've heard that kills me Cissy. Is it true Regulas is a death eater?" She looked at me with pity in her eyes and just nodded slowly. I felt tears start down my face and wiped them away impatiently. "Well then he doesn't need my sadness does he if he went into that group. God, what happened to the Black brothers Cissy?"

"She looked at me with a certain sadness in her eyes and simply said, "Our group fell apart when you left. The ones that were hit the hardest were the ones that loved you the most."

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(the last night of september)

As I was studying in the common room I decided I was going to pay the marauders a visit tonight in the shrieking shack....they wouldn't know who it was but it's a good idea. So I waited until I saw them all walking down the stairs together and called out to them. "Remus! I need to speak with you."

"Oh God, really? Remus are we really gonna go talk to her?"

"Of course Sirius. HE is going to come talk to ME and there is no YOU in this conversation do you understand?" I bet that pissed him off.

"Sure Terry I will talk to you. Sirius shut up and just go ahead I will meet you all there." He looked at them and pointed at the portrait hole.

"So Remus I have a proposition for you." I started as I watched them all walk out of the portrait hole. "I've decided I want to accompany you on these nights. Now before you say anything, I am completely equipped for this "mission", I chuckled. "I don't know if you know but every goddess is an Animorph and I'm kind of one of the biggest ones there are. So there is absolutely no chance of you hurting me. I promise."

"Okay, but I'm only saying yes because I know there is no way you will take no for an answer. So follow us out there and once we are all changed, change outside of the tree and wait there okay? We will meet you there I promise."

"Well what if I beat you all there? And I wait there for you as yall change?"

"I would rather you not see me change it's not exactly a pretty sight." He grimaces and once again I feel absolutely horrible for him.

"Remus you have absolutely nothing to worry about. If I see you change it doesn't at ALL make me look down on you, you do understand that?" I needed him to know there is no reason for him to worry about that kind of thing.

"Okay but hurry. It should be soon."

"Already there!" I smirked at him as I spun on the spot and disappeared. Next thing I knew I was in the Shrieking Shack. I walked up the stairs to the unused bedroom, changed into my animorph, and sat there waiting.

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RL POV

Wow that girl. She's crazy. She's also perfect for Sirius in so many ways. I can see why they got along so well when they were kids. Loose cannons, both of them. As I met up with the guys we walked down to the whomping willow. I have no idea where I would be without these guys by my side. They are the best friends anyone could ask for. Peter changes and prods the knot on the tree and it goes still. I wonder how she got here. As we walk up the stairs we hear heavy footsteps on the ceiling. Whatever she changes into is HUGE!! The others hear her as well but they don't know who it is so they change and walk up ahead of me. As soon as they walk into the room I hear Sirius growl and lunge at her. I see a blur of white and next thing I know there is a larger than life sized snow white tiger standing next to me. I looked at the stag in front of me and he's looking at her calculating. As I look down at her I note that she is the most beautiful, majestic creature I have ever seen. She is snow white with soft, silky fur and Saralina's bright eyes. She is also the size of an almost full grown horse! She's massive. She looks up at me with those gorgeous eyes and winks. It makes me laugh. Then all I felt was excruciating pain as the change starts.

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SW POV

Man that night was so much fun! We just ran and played the whole night. Sirius was a little skeptical at first but he warmed up to me. Well it looks like he doesn't remember my favorite animal either jerk face. I can't wait for the next one...it's supposed to be on Halloween so they had the Ball two days before. That's what we were all doing last night. Lily went with a guy named Michael Jacobs from Ravenclaw, A really sweet girl named Alice that is in our dorm went with her boyfriend Frank Longbottom. Karissa went with Sirius (obviously.) I mean i know it shouldn't bother me seeing as I'm Terry and not Saralina but I can't help but be a little bothered.

Lily went as a devil, Alice, a pirate, Rose was an angel, and Karissa was a cute lion. I went as an old school gangster.{costumes on profile} I loved my costume so much! It was so much fun but I still didn't find Regulas anywhere...oh well I will try to talk to him tomorrow or the day after. So here I am, ready for bed, and as I'm laying here I realize I can not sleep! It sucks, all I see in my mind when I close my eyes are Sirius and Karissa trying to eat each other. It's disgusting. You know why it bother's me tonight of all nights though? Because it's the anniversery of the last time I ever saw him. We were sitting together on the balcony. He said he was going to go back, his parents had taken him out first year, for a week to go to one of his uncle's funerals. We cried of course, but he wouldn't even look at me. He used to say crying made you look weak. That it was wrong, for a man to cry because it made it look like he wasn't as strong as he should be. I told him that night only an idiot would think that. Crying isn't anything to be ashamed of. It shouldn't be kept secret. It's how you grieve, everyone is expected to do it at some point. He looked at me then, right into my eyes, told me he loved me and left. I haven't seen him since. Like I mentioned earlier we had written but he stopped some time in his second year. I guess that's what's really bothering me. I really need something to occupy my mind.

I mean, I can go down to the common room and read. Okay I guess I know what I'm doing. So I grabbed my comforter, the fluffiest pillow I have, and one of my most favorite books ever, well Macbeth is more like a play, but it's still super amazing, and made my way down the stairs to the comfiest chair by the fire. But as I walked up to it I realized their was somebody already sitting in it. Damn it....I just can't get away can I?

"Hello mr. Sunshine. How are you this wonderful evening?" Like I didn't know. I just hoped it was the same thing I was feeling for the same reasons.

"Shut up Gray, you wouldn't understand."

"Try me..." I looked beseachingly at him as he turned to me.

"You really want to know? I just feel like I'm going crazy. All the stress about what's been going on lately, you know my brother joining the death eaters, and you coming into the picture, and then just missing someone... it's all just hitting me tonight." He kept avoiding looking at my face. It was extremely irritating.

"I'm sorry Sirius, but who are you missing?" Please say me! Please say me!

"Just a girl that I love...it's hard being away from her even though I haven't seen her in a while. But it seems like lately I've been hearing her voice. And I hear the Slytherins talking alot about her and it's making me worry even more because I don't know how to protect her from them. I guess that's it." He kept trying to hide his tears from me, but he's never been very successful at that anyway.

"Sirius, can't you just look at me? I don't mind if you're crying" here goes nothing...maybe it will comfort him.."Crying really isn't something to be ashamed of. It's a way to show grief and pain. Everyone has it at some point, so don't worry, I won't judge you or tell anyone if you don't want me to..."

"Where the hell did you come from!?!? Did you ever know a girl named Saralina White?" He looked a little angry but most of all he just looked lost.

"No, but I've heard about her, read about her family..." God this guy is suffering so much, why does he do this to himself?

"Well that's her the one I love, I can't believe I'm telling you this Gray. She mean't the world to me. Still does actually." He looked down at his feet for a moment and then into my eyes. His were full of pain, and devastating sadness.

"Why if you love her so much and miss her so much, why do you sleep around? Or use girls for you own entertainment?" I looked a little skeptical, but before my eyes the look in his eyes changed from sadness and pain, to guilt and fury.

"You know absolutely NOTHING about me!! You hear things, sure, I told you who I love, But you don't know how it feels to be so broken you don't know if you can ever go back. You don't have any idea what it's like to know the person you love is out there, but you can never be with them, and you KNOW you will never love anyone else like you loved them. Now if you'll excuse me. I'm going to have a very busy night tomorrow so I need all the sleep I can get." He turned away from me and practically stormed the staircase. The he abruptly turned back to me. " Oh and when you feel like having another one of these amazing chats with me, don't." And with that he disappeared up the stairs.

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DUN DUN DUN!!!! The plot thickens...so why does everyone think he uses these girls? And I already have an idea for the next chapter...I was going to put it with this one, but I don't know how long a chapter you guys like and for me I think the ones I have been writing are pretty long myself. So the next one is going to be the most action filled yet! Stay tuned!!!! Oh and PLEASE review? :)


	12. Chapter 12

First off I am so so so so so sorry that it has been like FOREVER since I last updated but I have had a SERIOUS case of writers block. But from here on I think I'm getting a good grip on the story so stay tuned!! Alright everyone...I don't know who is liking this story, thank you to those who have read and reviewed yall are amazing! Okay well this chapter is totally action packed. We meet a person from Saralina's life, and another full moon on Halloween to be percise. Also the moment all of you have been WAITING FOR!!!! Get ready, set, GO!!!

I do not own any of the things you recognize...sadly :'(

Also before there is anymore confusion, Remus and Lily know who she is so they call her Lina unless they are around people which they call her Terry. Also she knew James when they were very little and introduced James and Sirius so they have known each other for a long time. Just to clear that up!

Chapter 12- The Truth Revealed!!!

So, today is the day! Halloween and I can't WAIT for tonight...it's going to be so much fun I'm practically bouncing off the walls. Now I know why the marauders insist on going out there with them every time. Well all day I have been going out of my mind in anxiety. I mean this going out on the full moon thing is kind of fun, but I feel like I'm forgetting something. I also have like this ominous cloud hanging over my head like something really, really bad is going to happen tonight. Well I'm upstairs getting ready, trying to decide what I want to wear. Should I go for something tight so I can move? Or something baggy to be slighty more comfortable? Well I think just this once I'm going to go with tight black spandex pants that I can move in and a tight black cotton tank top that is oh so comfortable. For me I think I picked out the perfect outfit. Soft, and comfortable, but not horribly tight to where they hinder my movements.

I have to admit that when I walk down the stairs I wasn't ready for Remus to be waiting there for me to brief me on tonights "mission". Yet here he is looking peaky and a little nervous...wonder what he is so nervous about...?

"Lina?" he starts off..."I think that maybe tonight you should stay in."

"What?!?! Why?" I exclaim positively fuming, I have to admit yeah I think I shouldn't have screamed that loud seeing as he has sensitive hearing close to the moon, but I can't help but enjoy the jump I get out of him and how he almost cowers under my stare. I mean I know I'm a girl but it's not like I'm the most fragile china doll in the cabinet. You know what I mean? Yes I'm a girl and in this state, at my most vulnerable but it's not like I can't change at the drop of a hat. Oh well I guess these guys are just going to have to get used to the new addition because there is no way in hell that I am going to miss out on this. I have worked up until this moment for the whole month and there is no way they are going to keep me out of this.

"Lina, I have decided that it's just too dangerous and plus I get a very weird feeling about tonight. I don't think you should come out tonight. Maybe next month." Okay now I'm a little weirded out because I have been having weird feelings too...maybe it's a sign that I don't need to go. I mean I want to but every time it's brought up, no, everytime I think about it, my stomach wrenches like I'm about to lose my lunch. I don't know, I want to be there for him, but then I'm scared about what might happen if I am.

"Okay, Remus listen up and listen good. You are one of my best friends and I trust your judgement, but I am going to be there tonight for you whether you like it or not. Do you understand me Remmy? There is absolutely nothing you can do that will make me reconsider going out there and having the best damn time of my life. Got it peaches?" Not mentioning the fact that I already reconsidered it and made up my mind that I was going with him.

"Lina I honestly don't think this is a good idea. Don't you have something better to do than hang around me all night on one of my worst days? Is it really that important to you to not miss out on something as ridiculous as the moon cycles? Please, Saralina don't do this! Don't make me regret telling you my secret." He gets his sad, pouty face on, the one that most people can't resist (especially Rose tee hee) and just thinks that I'm going to give up that easily?!?!!?? I really don't think he knows me that well. Oh well here goes nothing.

"Remus that idiotic pout may work on some people, but it will NOT work on me understood?" His face practically deflated when I said that. "Now you said your piece and I said mine but I think it's about time you realized you are stuck with me whether you like it or not. Even if very soon you start to hate me there is no way you can persuade me from going out with you on these nights and keeping you company. No matter how many imbecilic friends you have already there."

"Ugh fine Lina come with us, see if I care, it's just your life you are putting on the line."

"Remus, did you really use that line on me trying to dissuade me from going with you?" I mean did he reallly think that crap is going to work? "It shows that you don't really know me that well you know? If you did know me at all, you would know saying something like 'it will put your life in danger' is the kind of thing I live for! What did you think I would say? What I really am going to tell you is that I love a challenge!"

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So as we are all galivanting around the grounds (the guys have finally warmed up to me by the way [not that they know who I am] ). Me and Remus running ahead of the group I spot something in the distance. It looks like a group of people. PEOPLE?!?!? What the hell do they think they are doing? Are they trying to get themselves killed? As soon as I think this Remus catches their scent and flies towards them like he was on fire and they were the last water on earth. 'Shit!!' I think as I chase after the big retard and tackle him to the ground. By now the others have caught on, and chased after us.

As I wrestle him to the ground clawing and biting Sirius and James change and run after the girls. SHIT! The girls!!! I forgot we were supposed to have a girl's night!!! Maybe that's what was going to go wrong. I wasn't going to show up and they were going to go looking for me because they were worried. Oh well, as long as Remus stays knocked out for a while it will be fine. I take Remus and drag him off somewhere far away to where I can't smell the girls anymore.

As I'm coming back I stop in the middle of the clearing, sit there, and just watch them all having it out with each other.

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SB POV

Damn I'm glad that tiger is on our side otherwise Lily and her stupid friends would have been goners. What the HELL were they thinking coming out here on a full moon?!

"What the hell is wrong with you guys??! You could have been killed! Are you honestly trying to tell us you didn't know that full moon means werewolves?" I bellow at them. Man I'm so pissed. They are all staring at me with these stupid looks on their faces: eyes bulging, mouths hanging open.

"What do you mean what the hell is wrong with us? You guys are the ones out here running around with a werewolf! Not to mention the fact that all of you are unregistered animagi. Which just adds the the problem! You could be killed and what you are doing is illegal!" Lily yells at us. Like she has any reason to be yelling at us! She's the one coming out here like an idiot!

"You know what miss goody-two-shoes? Why don't you tell us why you are out here in the first place?" Ha!

"Then we will tell you why we are since you already know our secret anyway." Damnit James now is NOT the time to suck up to her!!! Ugh I can't stand him sometimes. I roll my eyes and pull him slightly away from the girls that are just standing there.

"James, we are NOT going to tell them Remus's problem! If he wants to he can tell them himself. I know Lily knows already but I don't know who else does. For right now we will tell them that we are animagi but that is all they need to know, they don't need to know why." He looks at me and nods then walks towards Lily and smiles.

"Go on girlies! Why are you out here?" James asked.

"Well, we were all supposed to be having a girls night, you know the boy talk, and makeover kind of thing, but Terry didn't show up so we came to look for her, but since she isn't out here I think we should be going." Alice spoke up. I actually like Alice though. She is one of the only girls I can actually talk to and not feel like I need to sleep with her.

"Wait, you said Terry wasn't there?" Damnit! I turn around and look at that damn tiger just sitting there, point my wand at it, and voila! Look who decided to join us!

"Well, well. Never knew you had it in you, Gray! What are you thinking!?!?! You could get yourself killed!" She is so stupid, gosh that girl! What is wrong with her? Does she have a death wish or something?

"Well it seems we were thinking the same thing! We both came out to help our friend with his lycanthropy." She looked at me with that huge grin of hers, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. In her eyes was an anger that could rival my own.

"You are such a bit---Gray look out!!!!" Damnit!! "Girls! Get back in the castle!" I scream as I change and charge towards where Remus was attacking the small helpless from of Terry.

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SW POV

I was sitting there listening to that asshole Black ranting at me, when I heard his call. I turned as fast as I could to see Remus tearing across the field towards me since I was the closest. I jump to my feet without thinking about changing and run as fast as I can. Turns out a werewolf can out run a human. Who knew right? Then out of no where a huge black dog attacks Remus from the side! Woo hoo! Go Sirius!!!

"Shit I should probably change then huh?" I think out loud too myself. Hmm...I change into the tiger and then make my way towards the battling dogs. I get there just in time to see Remus tear into Sirius as I grab onto his neck and throw him towards the forest where he lays not moving. When I turn back to Sirius he has already changed himself back and is slowly losing conciousness.

James runs over with Peter just as I change back into Terry.

"What the hell Gray!!! He just saved your ass and all you can do is stand there and watch him die?!" He screams borderline hysterically. "Can't you do anything?!?!"

"Well if you will hold on just a minute jackass you will find that I will be able to do way more than you!" I bend over Sirius while James is about to have a hear attack and start running my fingers across his wounds and repeatedly alternating between latin and greek spoke the ancient healing words...

"_Curatio Phasmatis, iacio vestri misericordia down in is penuriosus animus quod permissum him sentio vestri admiratio vox!_"

"υγεία πνεύμα θέτω δικό σου mercy κάτω σε αυτό φτωχός ψυχή και ας αυτόν αισθάνομαι δικό σου θαύμα power"

"What the hell are you doing to him!!! What are you saying?!?!" James squealed in terror and awe as he sees the wounds healing and the blood that had drained out of his body returning. By this time, the sun had begun to rise and Remus had woken to find me kneeling over Sirius and healing him. He looked on with remorse in his eyes and told James to shut up because I know what I'm doing. Thank you Remus!

"It means 'healing spirit, lay your mercy down on this poor soul and let him feel your wonderous power'" I look over at him as he looks at me like I have four heads. "The first line was in latin, the second in Greek, it's what the Gods and Goddesses of old used to recite when they healed the ones they cared about." Well there is no use now in hiding the truth is there?

"Well why are you healing him after he's been nothing but an ass to you?" He inquires...rightfully so I guess but still, I suppose I can be a little truthful to him I mean its not like anyone else is around to hear, and he will figure out soon one way or another probably.

"It's hard to hate the person you first loved even if they are hateful." I sighed just plain exhausted from the draining in my power. It starts to wear me down after a while if I'm not in my true form.

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JP POV

She loves him? Since when? I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not completely clueless about how they always find themselves in situations together and the way they look at each other, but...come on... it's Terry Gray and Sirius Black. No one would ever think that they were in love by any means.

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SW POV

So, after James and I have finished that wonderful chat, Mr. Bravery himself starts to resurface.

"How ya doin, champ?" I asked him. He looked at me like I was a complete idiot and totally ignored my greeting. Then he pulled himself to his feet, with no effort I might add thanks to my excellent skills, and said...

"What the hell do you think you are doing so close to me Gray? I might catch something..."

Son of a bitch...well, in his case...

"Well excuse you but you wouldn't even be alive right now if it wasn't for me healing you!" I was finally snapping. I couldn't put up with his shit anymore. It gets old...fast.

"And I wouldn't have needed you to heal me if I didn't have to save your ass!" Oh that ungrateful asshole!! He is the one that put me in danger in the first place exposing me like that!! What did he even think he was going?

"I also wouldn't need saving if you had not been a nosy ass and changed me you dipshit!" Yeah wriggle out of the one!

"I wouldn't have needed to change you if you had just not been out here! We don't need you!" UGH!!! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!

"You know what? I am so tired of you ragging on me, and being such a douche bag, that I couldn't give a damn what you think about me right now! Or even better if you knew who I was. You have no idea the hell I have been through, so you just shut your ungrateful ass up about things you don't understand. You think it's even easy for me to look at you knowing who you were before you became who you are now? Wishing I could just see that sweet, innocent, caring boy that I had known and loved? But nevermind, don't worry about it, I don't give a shit anymore." And on that last note...I ran out of the forest. Just in time to hear a voice I hadn't heard in the longest time....

"Well look who's joined the party!!"

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So!!!! What did yall think? Worth the wait? I know after keeping you guys waiting for so long I really shouldn't have cut it off there. But I do have the next chapter written out so no need to fear! Thank you so much for the readers that have stuck with me through my horrible writers block (if there are any of you left :) I appreciate it and if you have any suggestions or comments or anything really the review box is ready and waiting for you words!!!


	13. Chapter 13

Wow okay...so anyway I was just thinking...since I have no more ideas for this story I might go on hiatus. I mean I do actually like this story but I can't think of anything else to put in it. After a while I might add to it, but since I don't know which direction this story is going I might just abandon it. If anyone, I don't care who you are, has any suggestions or comments or anything please, please, please let me know and I will take it into serious consideration. Thank you! Now onto the next chapter!!!

Chapter 13- The Father

(recap)

And on that last note I ran out of the forest, just in time to hear a voice I haven't heard in the longest time.

"Well look who's joined the party!!"

(end recap)

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BPOV

Damn! I mean really? There had to be at least twenty death eaters around here... I guess one of the slytherins had to go blabbing to their arrogant family members because now they are all facing me and laughing like I'm the funniest person in the fucking world.

"Well to what do we owe the immense pleasure? I mean surely there isn't a reason to be holding these three women hostage is there?" I asked seeing as the three death eaters in the front were holding Lily, Rose, and Alice.

"Hey Joey, come here and hold this one, I have to go greet this cheeky young woman." Wow, well at least I know who the main one is now...what a damn coincidence. He probably volunteered for this job. It's been so long since I saw him....he probably wanted to know why the hell I was finally sent to Hogwarts instead of some place like Durmstrang... "Well, it has been way to long hasn't it?" He asks me, strolling forward. I don't move to stop him but I put a forcefield between us and the boys so he can't do anything to them, and they can't do anything stupid to try and provoke him. I know how this man ticks that's for sure. I feel a small push as the boys try to manuever around me while the man comes closer. I find out I was right in my assumptions that the boys would try to protect me from this maniac. Then surely I saw a death eater in the back raise his wand when he saw the boys stop abruptly and fired a curse at them. Of course the curse disappeared as soon as it hit like I knew it would.

The man started laughing, "Protecting them? Really?" All the girls and boys looked at me Rose, Alice, James and Sirius in confusion, Remus and Lily in comprehension.

James spoke up at the worst time, "How would she be protecting us? She's muggleborn!" Like the idea was completely ludicrous. I loved that boy, but sometimes he was such an idiot!

Dammit of course he would laugh like it was the funniest he had ever heard in his whole life that I claimed to be muggleborn. "Really?" He talked in between chuckles. "You kept it a secret? How? I mean James and Sirius should know who you are, hell even little Alice over there should know." All the heads of the ones forementioned shot up but kept the silence as I looked up to him in defiance.

"Well it really isn't that big a deal father." I stated quite nonchalantly I must say so myself. Of course everyone but the death eaters gasped that time. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why do I call these people my friends again? Can they not tell when someone needs them to not show emotion?!

"Ah...so I see you have decided to follow in your mother's footsteps eh?" He said to me looking kind of bored with this interaction...and how the hell does he know anything about mom's allegiances?

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Please believe it!!! Pretty please!?

"Yeah, you know I would believe you if that wasn't exactly what your mother said to me when I saw her conversating with mudbloods! It was also the last thing she said to me before she, well lets put it lightly...joined your ancestors!" He said in that condescending voice of his. My eyes started to tear up as I thought about my poor mother. At least it was painless...I look at all of my friends faces and see either confused or pissed off expressions. When I slowly started to back away from him that just made him laugh harder. "What, don't tell me your scared!" He chuckles sinisterly.

"Of you?" I scoff "Never!" Shit I think that might have pissed him off...oh well I'm done now. I'm well passed pissed and more infuriated than anything. I think of course his hands are the most powerful part of him as he reaches over and decks me right across the face. I fall of course but heal instantly, he knows that. He just went for the effect of watching my friends try to come after him. Sick bastard... He looks at all of my friends and lastly his eyes land on Sirius, damn it....I was hoping he would stay a secret.

"Well it's such a privelage to see you again Sirius! It's been so long! Well now I have a question for you and I hope you can answer it correctly or your friend here will have hell to pay. I want you to tell me this wonderful young woman's name." He said gesturing to me. Please don't tell him my fake name Sirius have a little common sense please!!!

"Why should I give you her name? You should know you are her father after all aren't you?" Thank God Sirius has some sort of decency now.

"Well what about one of these lovely ladies who can't block my curse?" Damn it!!!! I didn't think about that, well here goes nothing.

"Sirius tell the man my name." I command. I look back at him and his eyes are wide with fear as he stares into my eyes silently asking if I'm sure. "Please Sirius just tell him my name." I beg. He must have seen that in my eyes so then he turns to my father and waits for him to ask again.

"Well Sirius let's not keep me and this fine audience waiting in suspense. What is this young lady's name?" He looks at Sirius with his eyebrows raised waiting for the proof I used an alias so he can shoot it down.

"Her name is Terry Gray." He states like it's the complete truth. Well, the truth according to what he know's anyway. Please father go easy on him!!!

"No, no, no, no, no! Her name is special! I thought you loved her Sirius. I thought you could tell who she was! I was counting on you boy, but once again you let me down." He shakes his head like he's disappointed.

"What?" Now Sirius is confused of course. Shit, what am I going to do? Father is going to rip him a new one!!!

"Well why don't we show him huh? Dear....Saralina White!" He practically bellowed so everyone could hear as I flinched at his sharp tone. I heard gasps go around the area as I stepped forwards toward that ass hole I call a father. With every step I took my Terry Gray disguise melted away and I was all of the sudden in front of my father as Saralina White.

"Let go of the girls." I commanded. If I was going to go with them they were not going to take the girls with them. God only knows what would happen to the poor things.

"Why do you care they are worth nothing!" He insisted. Obviously a little intimidated that I would take the bait so quick and change. He knows how much stronger I am in my true form and I think he was going to try to break me down in my small defenseless human form.

"If they are worth nothing then let them go!" I yelled as I stepped forward to intimidate him furthur. As soon as I said that though it looked like a light bulb went on over his head.

"You know what? I was seriously considering it, but now that you say that I realize they are worth at least a little money. Plus they could also be fun for the guys. It's not really so unexpected for us to test drive the merchandise before we put it up for purchase!" I shuddered as I thought about what they would do to those poor girls. Then I shuddered in anger as I felt my rage over take my powers and I saw red, literally.

"Let them go and I won't kill any of you! Let them go and I will come quietly." I bowed my head to show my surrender. The men in this business got some kind of sick pleasure knowing they were in control. What better way to make him think he was in control then to show an obvious sign of submission.

"Okay!" He screamed to the men. "Throw them to the wolves!" He lauged at his not so clever pun. I saw the guys literally throw the girls and next thing I know my father had grabbed my arm, spun me around and disapparated with a pop.

The last thing that happened before I felt like I was being pulled through a tube was hearing Dumbledore scream my name and seeing the tear stained face of the one and only self proclaimed macho man, Sirius Black.

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So what did you guys think? Too much in one chapter? Or just enough? So I thought this would be a good chapter to start my hiatus on until I have some more ideas or get any suggestions from you guys. I loved it though I have to say it's one of my favorites :) Well until next time!!! Please don't forget, any suggestion would be much appreciated!!!! Thank you!


	14. Chapter 14

Hello everyone! So I don't know who liked that last chapter but I really did...the next one is just going to be a filler chapter really about Sirius and what he was thinking while this was going on and then a little of James because like I said before James was Saralina's friend before he ever met Sirius so he had some kind of relation to her. Like she was his best friend when they were kids even though she had Sirius they kind of looked at each other as siblings. Also sorry for the horrible pun in the title...I just couldn't think of anything else.

Chapter 14 - A Sirius Perspective

What the hell was that!??!

I still couldn't get my mind over the fact that she had disappeared just like that. That in less than five minutes the reason for my whole existence was brought back to me and then snatched away so cruelly. I was borderline hysterical as I kneel on the ground staring at the place where she had disappeared from. In truth though, if I thought about it, I already had her. I was just too blind to see it.

I should have known. I should have seen her and known right away who she was but instead, I insist on being a dickhead and pushing her away. How could I have not known?! It surprises me that I didn't know who she was. Not just surprises me I guess but frustrates me...Even as I remember I realize that there were so many clues as to who she was that I should have known right away. The answer was staring me right in the face and like a complete idiot I ignore it.

I remember the first time I saw her when she walked into our compartment, she gave me this look (this is before I treated her like trash) like, she knew me. Like I should have automatically recognized her. Of course, I was so pissed that I didn't realize who I was staring straight at, and just lashed out because she didn't look like herself. Another thing I should have seen coming was the fact that she always compared me to "the way I used to be". That should have been a huge red flag, and I should have done everything in my power to figure out what she meant but instead I always brushed it off and said something hateful to her.

Her scars!! That horrible story she fed me that I should have seen right through. Like Lord Voldemort would follow up on anything without checking it out first.

The thing that should have tipped me off the most though was the mirror. Like Saralina would know anything about some muggleborn named Terry Gray getting attacked...I'm such a screw up...maybe if I had found out who she was in the first place, she wouldn't be gone. I could have protected her from her father and anyone else who tried to harm her. Of course she can kind of hold her own against some people but it would have made me feel like she was back in my life. Ah and the reason she isn't in my life in the first place. Her family. I hate them more than I think I hate anyone in my life. They are the ones that kept us apart all these years. They are to be blamed for every bad thing that has happened to either one of us in our lives together.

Of course the fact that I stopped writing her didn't help. I mean I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't hold onto a life I would never have anyway. I have always loved her and always will but she wasn't destined to have a future with a lowly wizard. She was the one that was supposed to make a difference for all of the Gods and Goddesses stuck on this earth. Saralina White is the one who was to open the gates once more for the other Godly creatures who had gotten lost on this earth and free them from the chains holding them back. I want her though...I want her for myself...and I will have her. I will travel to the ends of the world to find her and bring her back to me. To save her from Voldemort and his psychotic followers. I will do everything in my power to have her back in my arms and I know just the person to help me.

"James? I need your help."

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JPOV

Shit! I thought as I ran towards the place where she disappeared. No, this couldn't be happening to her. Not Saralina. How could I have not known this was her? She is the closest thing to a sister I have ever had. I remember the first time I had met her.

FLASHBACK

_There was a pond on the expansive property of the Marko's at Marko Manor. On the bank of this pond was a majestic Willow Tree. Of course I wanted to explore but as the trunk of the tree started coming into view as did a tiny girl. She had beautiful black hair, but just underneath it was a shock of white. She was small, smaller than most people my age, but she looked flawless as she sat propped up against the tree, with one of those big poofy dresses she used to be forced into by her mother. She seemed to be making something with small black and white peices of thread. As I came closer and watched I saw small peices of metal materialize in her hands as she threaded the colors around them. They were completely unique, but I was just in awe how the little metal peices appeared out of thin air. It seemed to be a bracelet in the making. (on profile)_

_"Are you just going to stand there or are you going to come sit down?" She asked me. Even at that age she was a spitfire. She looked up at me with these gorgeous bluish, green eyes that held more age and wisdom than I had seen in my four years. I looked at her and smiled big as I took the seat next to her. She looked at me and grinned as her hands kept with their business._

_"How do you do that?" I asked. She looked at me bemusedly._

_"What do you mean?" She asked, "How do I do what?"_

_"Make that metal appear out of no where?" I looked as yet another metal peice popped into her hands, and she threaded over it like it was nothing. She looked down at her work and smiled proudly. She put her work down and looked at me._

_"You mean like this?" She asked and looked down at her hands in concentration. Next thing I knew, there was a miniature figure of a lion made of complete metal. (on profile) "Is this what you were talking about?" She said as she handed it to me. "That's for you by the way. Since your favorite animal is a lion and all."_

_"Yes. That's exactly it. How did you know lions were my favorite animal?" It really did confuse me. Who was this girl and how did she know things and say them with such certainty?_

_"I knew because you have a lion on your shirt and also you are a Potter after all. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out really." Oh...I forgot about my shirt. Also of course she would know about the Potter lineage. Well she didn't seem stuck up about it though. I watched her as she smiled at me and then picked up the thing she was working on before._

_"Who are you making that bracelet for?" I asked. She looked like she was putting alot of effort behind it and it was beautiful._

_"My best friend in the whole world!" She beamed as she said this. "He's so amazing. His name is Sirius Black, I know he's a Black, but he's nothing like his family. Trust me! That's why I'm making it black and white. His name is Black, my name is White." She said this like it was the most simple thing on earth. I couldn't believe that she actually trusted this guy. I could tell that she was a really good judge of character though unlike the rest of her family so I decided to go with her on this one._

_"I thought your name was Marko?" I asked a little thrown._

_"My father's name is Marko. All of the women from the White family tree keep their last name to differentiate from the normal witches." That's when it hit me! White is the name of the Goddesses. "Ya know, Sirius is going to be at this banquet tonight. Would you like to meet him?"_

END FLASHBACK

Wow without her I wouldn't have known Sirius. I look over at him and see his tear streaked face staring out from the place she disappeared lost in thought.

"James I need your help." I hear him call. I look at him and see that glazed look in his eyes get replaced with determination. "I know that Dumbledore will be able to find her, but when we get her back, will you help me keep her safe?"

"Of course Padfoot, she means the world to me too ya know?" I state as I look over through the forbidden forest.

"Just making sure." He says. He comes up to me and puts a hand on my shoulder, but I look over as something catches the light of the sun. I look over to the hand on my shoulder and to the black and white bracelet that stands out like a beacon of his love for her. That shines just as bright as her name.

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Okay I know that last line was pretty cheesy but I think this chapter is cute. I'm glad I got part of James in there and I hope that I did him justice. I know they are supposed to be like four or five, but I thought since they are purebloods or whatever they are raised with impeccable manners and I just liked the was they acted :) Please review!!!


	15. Chapter 15

Okay here is the fifteenth chapter!!! Guess who is going to make a comeback!? Come on guess!!! Whoever gets it right gets a huge cyber hug from me!!!!! I love all you readers so so so so much and I'm glad that you are enjoying the story! So keep reading! I think this is going to be the longest chapter so far! :) Also for those of you who read my twilight story on I'm sorry I haven't gotten another update for that one but it's just sooo hard!!! I'm working on the next chapter and trying to make it an Edward POV but I'm thinking I want to make the rest of the story after that in third person. So please don't give up on me!!!

Thank you!!!

Let's see...We have a talk between Sirius and a Professor. A scuffle among friends. A Ball. and...GUESS WHO RETURNS!!! :) Enjoy!

I don't own any Harry Potter things you recognize! (Psh like you didn't know that already :)

(Another thing I didn't mention before is that when Saralina is consumed by her powers they kind of take her over like on x men three with ice man. Yeah she looks like that when it happens. Just fyi!)

As for the chapter title of this one...OH NO!?! WHO COULD IT BE?!?!? (tee hee)

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Chapter 15 - Time of Dying

"Professor?" I asked as I poked my head in the door of his lavish office. "You called for me?"

"Yes. Yes I did dear boy. Come on in." The old wizened man nodded his head and rubbed his eyes. The poor guy looked like hell...of course it has been two months since someone in his care went missing. Not just anyone either. A goddess...MY goddess...

"So have you had any luck in finding her?" I asked. "I mean she can't be that well hidden, Death Eaters like her father are stupid. They will like to try and flaunt the fact that they took someone from right under your nose. If anyone would be proud of that it would be her screwed up father."

"I know that Mr. Black, but you must be patient. I'm sure they would have done that with anyone else, but not with Ms. White. She is much too important to flaunt about." He told me as he looked at me with those wise blue eyes that seemed to have lost their sparkle.

"Sir I need her back...I don't know how much longer I can wait before I go after her myself..." I start to almost hyperventilate sitting there, thinking about what they could be doing to her.

"Mr. Black need I remind you, that you were a terror to Ms. White when she was in the form of Terry Gray. What makes you think that she is going to forgive you so readily if I'm not being to bold in asking?" He gave me this all knowing look that thoroughly creeped me out, and I knew he was trying to distract me so I wouldn't have a stroke in his office, so I thought about his question. Yeah I mean she's going to be mad at me for a while, but it's nothing we can't get past... I have already stopped sleeping around and all the girls here are starting to freak out. I can stop being as arrogant as I am now, I mean I know it will take a while but I'm sure I can do it. I need some way to show her that she was, still, and will always be the only girl for me....As I started thinking about other things that I can do Professor Dumbledore started talking again.

"Now I know some people won't think it's very appropriate, but I need to get a few things for the Ball in order. Would you like to help me Mr. Black?" Of course, the Back to Term/New Year Ball. We have one every year.

"Sir, I thought you would have canceled that given the circumstances..." I think maybe I should bring it back to his attention that there is a missing girl with her fate in his hands!

"I am more aware than you think of the 'circumstances' Mr. Black, but I'm sure all of these kids need one night to put their troubles and worries away and, have fun." Ah. There's that twinkle. Slowly and surely it's coming back.

"Okay I suppose I could help you, but can we talk about any plans that are being made to get Rali back?" I gave him an almost pleading look. I know he is trying to distract me from it, but I just can't get my mind off of her. Every second she is gone is a second of time that I lose that I could be begging for her forgiveness.

"Right now Mr. Black I just need any kind of clue to where she is I just need to wait until I figure it out." He's kidding right? He has to be...

"Are you trying to tell me, that you are just going to sit back and wait until they find her body?! She's going to be dead before you find her if you go at this rate!" I scoffed at him. Then I started freaking out again...almost started banging my head against the wall, but I thought that would be a little much.

"Mr. Black they need her. They are NOT about to kill her no matter how uncooperative she is. I will find her unless she escapes before i do I can promise you that." Yeah, yeah I'm sure you will... "Sirius look at me, LOOK at me Sirius!" I look into his eyes shining with sincerity and promise. "I will find her. No matter what happens. Now look there is one week until the Ball. If I don't get any hint of where she is before then, I will wait until the day after the Ball and as soon as I wake up I will go straight to the Marko Manor. I promise you."

"I believe you, and I trust you with her. Just please, please bring her back to me." I say with my treachorous tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "I can't live without her." I turn around and start to walk towards the dorms. "Thank you sir."

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(RIGHT BEFORE THE BALL)

"I can't believe we are going to go to this stupid thing while Rali is out there being tortured..." I spat as I was tying my tie.

"Yeah way to bring down the mood Pads." James...of course. "Rali will be back in no time, I have a feeling about this." Oh please...I rolled my eyes. We are getting ready for the Ball and then tomorrow Dumbledore is going to bring her back to me.

"Oh you do huh? You only have a good feeling about it because Lily said yes to this idiotic dance and you don't give a shit really if Rali comes back!" God what a prick.

"That's bullshit Sirius! I care more for Rali than you will ever know. She's like a sister to me and it's tearing me up inside but I can't just sit and wallow in self pity until she gets back or I will get no where!"

"No where with Lily right?! All you care about is you, you selfish bastard!!"

"I'm the selfish bastard!? All you cared about was getting laid!! You couldn't even tell when Saralina was staring you in the face you were so wrapped into yourself!!!" What an asshole! I decked him in the jaw and then he got me in the stomach. We were rolling around on the floor in our best clothes when Remus walked in.

"What the hell is this? James you have a date and you are rolling around on the floor with Sirius? And Sirius isn't going with anyone? What is this world coming to?" We had stopped when he walked in and now we were all laughing. Remus knew how to do that for us. He always breaks up the fights and makes us all like each other again.

"Sirius, James, Professor Dumbledore will find Rali. He has to. That or she comes back before he can. She's strong, you both know that. Now stop acting like its some weak girl that they have when you both know she's not." He raised his eyebrow and gave us both a pointed look. "Now it's almost time to go down there and you guys look ridiculous." He gave an exasperated sigh and started helping us clean up.

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(THE BALL)

(no pov)

The Black and White Ball at the beginning of the year is a huge deal. Everyone goes to it even the Slytherins. That's why Sirius is sitting by himself at a table towards the left glaring at his brother as Regulas glides through the other dancers with his date.

'He acts like he doesn't have a care in the world, when the woman we both love is most likely being tortured by his superiors' Sirius grumbled as he sat gawking at his brother. 'Well it's not like he cares about us anymore anyway...he's already a death eater.'

'James is no better flaunting Evans around like she's the Goddess she isn't. He's so pathetically in love with the idea of having red headed, green haired children with glasses, it's laughable.'

"Settle down everyone and please be seated at your tables." Dumbledore said as he stared out into the crowd looking at all the young and happy faces and then the morose lonely one. "I would just like to take the time to talk about one of our students who went missing halloween night two months ago. All of you knew her as Terry Gray, but her real name was Saralina White. She as most of you know" He paused and looked at the Slytherin tables. "She is the Goddess Of Elements and she asked me that on the event of her getting taken from my school to let you all know who she is." He looked down and Sirius saw that the old man had tears in his eyes. James looked at Sirius 'He's handling this better than I would have' James thought. 'If Lily was the one kidnapped I would be a total wreck. Not that I'm not because Saralina means so much to me, but I thought someone who loved her like he did would be torn apart.' James didn't take into consideration that Sirius doesn't show his emotions outward. An old trick he learned from Saralina. She always used to tell him not to show any emotion in front of people that can destroy you. Then all of the sudden everyone in the great hall jumped as the doors were thrown open and hit the walls.

"What a gracious host." Saralina drawled. Everyone stared at her like she was crazy. "What? Did I miss the party?" She pouted. She looked absolutely amazing. She had her hair in perfect curls that were strewn about everywhere around her head. She had on a short black dress, with metal peices on it and big, silver jewelry.

"Ms. White please come forward." Dumbledore was worried that something bad had happened to her. She wasn't acting like her usual self. She wouldn't look him in the eyes and there is no way she could have escaped unharmed. It doesn't matter how fast a Goddess heals, she wouldn't be able to heal that fast.

"Well Dumbledore, I don't think that's such a good idea. I mean, I don't think you want the kind of information that I have to offer." That's when she decided to look up. Dumbledore gasped. Her eyes, which are a usual bluish green color, were black. Her whole eye, not just her iris was black and shiny like a shutter had been pulled over her eyes.

"Ms. White you need to come up here now." He got this commanding tone and Sirius automatically knew that was a bad idea. He wanted to run to her, hold her close, tell her how much he loved her, and how he was sorry, but he couldn't. It was like something had glued him there. He couldn't move, and he knew it was all the guilt and fear he felt about looking her in the eyes and apologizing.

James was freaking out. In all the years he had known her he had only seen her like this once and knew what it meant. Sirius did too for that matter but her attention was solely focused on Dumbledore. She slowly waltzed up to Dumbledore and looked into his eyes. As soon as she did Dumbledore felt a shock and was locked into place as memories that weren't his own flooded his mind.

*FLASHBACK*

_Men everywhere in black robes and masks guarding a locked dungeon hall. Making sure that a certain someone was incapacitated. They had three dragons out on the main floor to ensure no one escaped and death eaters surrounded the place. It wasn't the outside that mattered though. On the inside there was a teenage girl. Not just any girl. She was beaten and bruised, bound and gagged. She could barely move let alone speak, so she didn't know why they gagged her when they might have crushed her vocal cords anyway..._

_She heard the locks on the door start to move and sat straight up as best as she could. They had done everything imaginable to her. Unspeakable and horrifying, but not unheard of among death eaters. She was sore everywhere with whip marks in her back and a loss of her innocence they threw her in this hell hole and she knew she would get revenge, even if it lead to her death. She would do anything in her power to make them hurt just as much as they had made her hurt. She had been here for three weeks and she had already started losing track of time. She had been beaten like a muggle, tortured with the cruciatus until she almost bled out. She was delusional when the men started forcing themselves upon her and she was so weak she couldn't fight them off. They had starved her, and shared her. Still she had not surrendered her power and they hoped it was only a matter of time until she would eventually break. They never counted on how strong she is both physically and mentally._

*a month and a week later*

_She felt stronger. Her body was conditioning to the terrifying tortures that they put her through so her body had started to get used to it and she could withstand anything they tried to throw at her now. She was skinnier than she had been, but that was only from the starvation and dehydration. Her Goddess appearance helped her not be so skeletal, but you could tell she wasn't being taken care of. She had acummulated more cruciatus scars and some others. They tried to cut her hair, but everytime they were done it would just grow in longer so now it was down to past her butt. She was almost strong enough to start manipulating matter, but she needed someone else in the room to feed off of their strength. As she waited she tallied up the people she would pay back._

_Lucius Malfoy (mother and father)_

_Bellatrix Black (mother and father)_

_Rudolfus Lestrange (brother mother and father)_

_Marcus Crabbe (father)_

_George Goyle (father)_

_Lord Voldemort_

_Barty Crouch Jr._

_She couldn't recognize anyone else, but she wasn't about to give up. There was one person who came to see her only once during their Christmas Break and that was Regulas Black. She couldn't believe he had the nerve to show up where he knew she was hidden, knowing that she was being tortured and not do anything about it. He's pathetic and she knows she will never forgive him. He can grovel all he wants, but that's not going to get him anywhere with her. If he had participated in the torture he would be dead. She would have already killed him. For now she is just going to wipe him from her memory, unless he feels the need to provoke her. Damn she had to get her ass out of here. _One more person...come on_, she thought. _You assholes ALWAYS find a reason to come in here_, she thought as she paced the hell hole she was chained in. _Come on_... She heard the lock turn, _HELL YES_!!!! She ran softly towards the part of the floor she was laying in when they left and layed down._

_"Wakey wakey darling." Ugh he's here...of course. Voldemort had just walked into her room... He walked towards her spot and nudged her gently with his foot. Ha, like there was anything gentle about this man. "Come on Saralina Get UP!!" He finished on a yelling note and kicked her in the stomach._

_"What the fuck old man that hurt!" She screamed in his face as she jumped up._

_"Well it seems you are awake, and well. I can change that so you need to watch what you say to me." _Ha I would like to see him try something...come on... do it!!!

_"It seems you are in good health... I know something that will show your place in this world is behind me. Join my army and you will not have to feel another ounce of pain. Be my queen and stand behind me." He wanted her to be his queen...was he serious? He's like twenty years older than her._

_"Not that it isn't flattering that you want me to be with you, but I don't date men twice my age that only want me for my power. Also if anything I will be standing in front of you. There is no way I would be anyone's follower much less a snake." He punched her in the stomach and then kicked her after she fell and hit her head on the ground. Then he tortured her with the Cruciatus Curse for who knows how long until she actually was almost bleeding to death and gave in and screamed for him to stop._

_"Still thinking of leading me White? Your mother thought about going to the other side and look how she turned out. You don't want that to happen to you, do you?" If he thought that was going to motivate her to follow him he was sadly mistaken..._

_"Oh I'm not just thinking of leading you." She coughed out as she started spitting up blood. "I'm thinking of making you suffer so much that you won't even remember your own name and you are begging me to just give you over to the death that you definantly deserve but so stupidly run from." He stood there in shock as she slowly stood up bleeding heavily and staggering to him to stare into his snake like eyes. "For right now though I would just like to leave you in as much pain as I can in the condition I am in." Then all of the sudden she grabbed his arm and wrenched it out to her as she drew from his powers. As soon as she could she smiled at him and with a "Toodeloo!" she disappeared. The last thing she heard that satisfied her to no end was his tortured yell as he dropped to the ground burned from head to toe._

*END FLASHBACK*

Dumbledore was brought back to the present with a jolt and stumbled back as his back hit the teachers table.

"Satisfied?" She asked. "Are you glad you finally know the mystery of what happened to me. Too bad what you saw wasn't even a taste of what happened to me." She sneered at him. "You didn't feel the endless pain and sorrow I did when I thought they were just going to torture me until I died. You didn't feel the hatred and betrayal I felt when I saw Regulas Black come to see me in that dump and not help me out of it." She hopped off of the platform and while she was in the air disappeared. No one had to wait long to see her because the next thing they knew she was standing behind Regulas. "Ah Reggie. How I trusted you. You told me you would help me get out of there, and believe it or not I believed you." She slowly walked around to face him and smiled. Oh Reggie, how much I loathe you now. You left me there to rot, and now my only regret is that I thought that you loved me." She saw pain flash in his eyes and felt oldly redeemed. She gave him a look of pure hatred and then her hair turned white and she disappeared again. Everyone looked around for her, but then the next thing they knew she had a bundle of Slytherins tied up with a fire rope that would burn them if they tried to move.

"That is enough Saralina you need to put an end to this right this moment or I will!" Dumbledore threatened. When she just looked back at him and scoffed he threw a spell her way. When it bounced away, the shield around them became known and that's when Dumbledore really started to freak out. He knew the only way to get that shield down was if she became incapacitated and right now he didn't know how that was possible seeing as her powers had taken her over.

"I think it's time we had a little fun don't you?" She said as she smiled at them, and they all looked at her in fear.

Sirius knew that look and knew that they were going to witness something unspeakable that he didn't want anyone to see Saralina do.

On the ground I lay,

Motionless in pain,

I can see my life flashing before my eyes

Did I fall asleep?

Is this all a dream?

Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare

I will not die

I will survive

(CHORUS)

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

I feel alive, when your beside me

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

In my time of dying.

On this bed I lay

Losing everything

I can feel my life, passing me by

Was it all too much?

Or just not enough?

Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare

I will not die

I will survive

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

I feel alive, when your beside me

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

In my time of dying.

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

I feel alive, when your beside me

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

In my time of dying

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

I feel alive, when your beside me

I will not die, I'll wait here for you

In my time of dying

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Okay this chapter would have been alot longer, but I wanted something for the next chapter. The song Time of Dying by Three days Grace (which is the title) is super amazing and that is what lyrics are at the end they center on how she felt while she was locked up. The person she was waiting for was Sirius to rescue her, it's supposed to be after Regulas came to see her and she thought someone was coming to save her. You should check the song out it's really good. :) Do you think the song fit the chapter? So review and tell me what you thought about this chapter please :) Did you think I could have brought her back a better way? Let me know!


	16. Chapter 16

Okay I'm so sorry it has taken me so long to get this out, but I had the worst case of writers block and I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I've also had alot on my mind, but I just want to thank all of you who haven't given up on me... I love you all!!!! Also this chapter is kind of violent, I know but I just want to get across the fact that they tortured her for months and she just had to endure it. In case you didn't understand before her powers have taken over her body because she didn't have enough strength to go on. This isn't really Saralina doing all these things it's her subconcious. Thanks for reading!

*I don't own anything you recognize from jk rowlings books*

* * *

Chapter 16 - Animal I Have Become

**RECAP**

_"I think it's time we had a little fun don't you?" She said as she smiled at them, and they all looked at her in fear._

_Sirius knew that look and knew that they were going to witness something unspeakable that he didn't want anyone to see Saralina do._

**END RECAP**

"Oh don't look so frightened. I won't do a number of those dreadful things you did to me." She chuckled grimly and her face turned into a mask of hatred and anger. "The way you ignored my begging and pleading for you to stop you merciless BASTARD!!!" she yelled.

"Now darling don't do anything ra... AH!" Lucius finished his ludicrous statement with a squeal as she pulled the fire whip from him and let it burn for a second. She easily trapped everyone else as he was left without backup against her. She slowly stalked towards him, and stopped right when they got nose to nose.

"You think you are so fucking clever Lucius Malfoy don't you?" She drawled as she smirked evilly at him. The same smirk she had seen on his face as he tortured her in that abhorrent dungeon. She slowly circled him as eveyone outside the circle could only look on in horror at what she was about to do. "I'm not going to torture you with curses and jinxes. No I'm not going to do that, it would be the easy way out for you. I'm going to do something unblockable to people like you." She slowly raised her hands and her hair turned red as flames poured from her hands and wound their way around him. He screamed in pain as he fell to the floor writhing, his face contorting in pain. Sirius runs up to the side of the forcefield.

"Saralina!!! Stop love please!! Don't do this, this isn't you. This is something else." He looked helpless at her with tears in his eyes as she looked at him with a blank expression on her face. Slowly her eyes started to dull into a lighter color.

"Sirius?" She asked softly as she stumbled a little. His eyes snapped open wide and he nodded rapidly.

"Yes love it's me. Please stop this. It doesn't make you any better than them to do this to them. I know you really want to give them some semblence of the pain that you had to endure by their hands, but love they are just getting what they want from you! They wanted a retaliation, they wanted something to show that it bothered you." He sounded hopeful, but the hopeful glint in his eyes slowly faded as he saw her snap back into the mindset her powers put her in as her eyes darkened once again.

"Are you kidding me?! Of course I'm going to be angry!?! Do you even understand what they did to me you idiot?!" She screeched over the sound of Lucius's wailing. "Oh do shut up you numbskull. Of course it's going to hurt what did you think it was going to do to you." She snarled at Malfoy as she kicked out at him. "Ugh fine." She snapped her fingers and the flames disappeared and Malfoy lay on the floor panting, completely unharmed. "Well would you look at that?" She mockingly looked at Sirius. "Not a scratch on him!" She clapped her hands excitedly and smiled. Then she raised her hand at him and his body raised into the air as she threw him out of the forcefield so hard that he banged against the wall.

Next, she turned to two more of the group and pulled them out of the rope the same way she did Malfoy. Both Crabbe and Goyle were choked to where they couldn't breath and she didn't stop until she felt one of their throats crush. Then she threw them out as well like toys she was finished with.

She turned and looked at the Lestrange brothers and tried to decide what to do with them. "What do you think I should use on you?" She asked them politely. "Sand or water?"

"Well I think you should just let us the fuck out of here you psychotic BITCH!" Rudolphus screamed at her. His younger brother was crying, but he was just standing there all in her face.

"Hmmm. I don't really like that idea. It's not very creative is it? Plus, you had a nasty tone of voice when you suggested it, so I think not." She cocked her head to the side and raised both her hands, palms up, in the air. "So what do you think? Sand?" Dirt appeared in her right hand. "Or water?" As water appeared in her left. They just looked at her in fear, because she had a ruthlessness in her stance to rival the Dark Lord's. "Well since you aren't going to answer me maybe it should be both?" She threw both of her hands out and water and dirt caked into mud. It hit them and disappeared. Everyone was confused because nothing had happened to them. Their confused expressions turned horrified once they started seeing them cough up a muddy substance. They slowly started suffocating from the mud in their throats and Saralina rolled her eyes as she heard Dumbledore yelling at her to release them at once.

"Fine!" She sighed as she threw them at him. "They were getting boring anyway. I mean I was expecting them to do something, but the just kind of sat there." Dumbledore had already fixed up Malfoy, but Crabbe and Goyle were taken to the hospital wing because she had broken their necks. He set the Lestrange brothers on one of the tables and did some fancy wandwork as everyone looked on and the passageways in their throat were cleared. They started gasping for air as Dumbledore sighed in relief.

"Now for the fun part!! I have been waiting on you Ms. Black." Saralina smirked at her when Bella came and stood right in her face.

"I don't know what the hell your problem is White, but this is bullshit!" Bella screamed in her face. Saralina didn't look phased as she buffed her nails on her dress.

"You really don't know what my problem is? Are you kidding me? My problem is the fact that you and the band of idiots, who I just took down single handedly by the way, think you can strut around this place like you own it. That you torture people on a daily basis in more ways than one and come off scottfree! That's what my problem is you self righteous, pompous, conceited BITCH!" Saralina screamed as she threw Bella back where she landed kneeling. "Little miss perfect Black daughter once again on her knees. What would daddy dearest think? If you can bow to that complete scumbag Voldemort..."

"How dare you say his name you filth!" Saralina slapped her and covered her mouth with a metal plate. She turned and continued pacing in front of Bella.

"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, Since you can bow to Voldemort you can obviously bow to me. So..." She took her wand out and Bella's eyes widened in fear. "Imperio! Now... slowly..." She started to pull Bellatrix's head down, but as she was doing that Sirius saw Saralina's head start to droop.

"Rali?" He asked slowly. Her head softly turned towards him and he saw her eyes...They had started to lighten up, an even worse thing about her is that the area around them had started to turn a light purple that kept getting darker as he stared. Bellatrix's mouth was uncovered as the metal disappeared and she came out of the trance the spell put her under and stood up. Then everyone started to freak as cuts and gashes appeared on Saralina's body. Dumbledore saw her faultering and took that moment to try to penetrate the forcefield around her and Bella. The first attempt didn't work, but as she started to bleed heavily, large puddles surrounding her with blood, he tried again and the focefield disappeared as she started to sway. Bellatrix started laughing like a maniac until James stunned her, and Sirius ran forward just in time to catch Saralina as she fell in a heap towards the floor covered in blood.

ANIMAL I HAVE BECOME (Three Days Grace)

I can't escape this hell

So many times I've tried

But I'm still caged inside

Somebody get me through this nightmare

I can't control myself

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?  
No one will ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal  
(This animal, this animal)

I can't escape myself  
(I can't escape myself)  
So many times i've lied  
(So many times i've lied)  
But there's still rage inside  
Somebody get me through this nightmare  
I can't control myself

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?  
No one will ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become  
Help me believe it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal

Somebody help me through this nightmare  
I can't control myself  
Somebody wake me from this nightmare  
I can't escape this hell

(This animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal)

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?  
No one will ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become  
Help me believe it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal  
(This animal I have become)

(SO WHAT DO YOU THINK? DOES IT MATCH THE CHAPTER?)

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So what did you guys think of this one? I know it's been a very long time and it's also a very short chapter for such a long time you had to wait, for that I'm sorry!! I honestly thought I would get this done before now, but I like the way it turned out.

If anyone has any ideas for the next one let me know and THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN TO LILY_POTTER FOR THE WONDERFUL BANNER ON HARRYPOTTERFANFICTION!!!!!!


	17. Chapter 17

Alright please don't hate me!! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in so long but I just haven't had any kind of inspiration but Lily_Potter has been giving me some wonderful advice and I am very thankful to her :) Well this chapter has some of her ideas in it so if anyone likes it go thank her!!! It has been quite a while since I updated last but I can tell you they are hopefully going to be coming in faster and faster...I'm kind of over my writer's block so it shouldn't be a problem. And to all of my faithful readers, THANK YOU!!! Okay on with the show!!! Plus the song for this chapter which is the title "Hello" by Evanescence...never heard it? Or just want to hear it again? Go check it out!! lol

Also just another little tidbit...There is a character death in this one and a little bit of sensitive material (talking to oneself and seeing visions...pretty much losing their mind a little bit) if you get offended by that please don't read it... and since it's been so long I will do a little recap!!

I don't own anything you recognize they all belong to JK.

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Chapter 17 - Hello..?

**RECAP!!!**

_"The first attempt didn't work, but as she started to bleed heavily, large puddles surrounding her with blood, he tried again and the focefield disappeared as she started to sway. Bellatrix started laughing like a maniac until James stunned her, and Sirius ran forward just in time to catch Saralina as she fell in a heap towards the floor covered in blood."_

**END RECAP!!!**

NO POV

'Dammit!' Sirius thought as he sped down the hallways that led to the hospital wing. 'She can NOT die! I won't let her.' He was determined as he burst through the doors. To see Madam Pomfrey with her back to him helping Crabbe.

"Another one?" She asked as she slowly turned towards Sirius. "When is Dumbledore going to put in end to-- good heavens!!" She exclaimed as she saw Saralina dripping everywhere and Sirius, holding her, covered in her blood. "What on earth happened to her!?! I know she was doing this but how did she get hurt?"

Sirius was on the verge of breaking down when he went to the nearest bed and spread Saralina out on it. "Can you save her?" he pleaded as he practically fell to his knees at her bedside.

"Well of course I can Mr. Black." She started. Pomfrey was having a hard time looking at the open, bleeding, and bruised form of Saralina. "But I need to know how it happ-"

"No you don't!! Just do what you say you can, and save her she's almost dead in case you didn't notice! Or maybe it has escaped your notice if you can't even look at her!!!" He bellowed in her face just as Dumbledore rushed in the wing.

"Mr. Black, Sirius, now is not the time to start this we need to see if we can save her. Right now I need your full cooperation. It's going to get hard and painful... you will relive things you most definantly don't want to but there is also no guarantee that she will live through this. It will be strenuous on both of your bodies and you will probably have to stay in here for a while."

"Just tell me if it will save her life, I will do anything." Sirius looked up at him and Dumbledore saw how defeated this poor boy is. Dumbledore had seen how much Sirius had been changing since he found out who was really Terry Gray. Or maybe the truth of the matter is that Sirius Black had always been only a helpless child who suffered torture from pretty much everyone else in his family for being different since he was just a child; Now that he is almost grown Sirius may be hardened by the hand God had dealt him, but that didn't mean he was as heartless or unfeeling as everyone seemed to think. He was just someone who needed his other half. Now that he had her in reach Dumbledore knew that there was no way in hell that Sirius would be letting go now.

"I'm not quite sure it will save her. Her body and soul has suffered such extensive damage, but it's the only thing that might remotely work seeing as most of these wounds are magic induced, and she's not exactly a regular witch is she?" Sirius started to mumble to himself. Dumbledore was a little concerned for the boy but wrote it off as being worried about Ms. White. Sirius couldn't be losing his mind over it. It just wasn't his style. "So since I need someone who knows pretty much everything about her I'm sure you are the only one that will do. What you will need to do is sit down next to her and hold her hand. Then as soon as you hear me start to chant you will remember the very first time you ever met her. It will start there, you will see it in your mind, and feel everything you felt. Then my words will slowly sift through your mind for all of the thoughts and memories you have ever had with her in it. You will practically relive everything you have ever done or endured that she was apart of. It will be physically and emotionally draining. Are you up for it?" Dumbledore asked surveying Sirius with undisguised intrigue. Sirius looked up at him desperately and nodded.

"I was just wondering one thing." Sirius spoke, his voice hoarse with emotion. "If there was one other person who could do this would it make it go any faster or help her if we did it at the same time?" Dumbledore moved closer to him. He saw the raw emotions swimming in Sirius's eyes. He could see the desperation and could practically feel it coming off of him in waves.

"Well of course but anymore than two people and it would overflow and possibly kill her, so who is it that you think knows enough about her to help?" Just as Dumbledore finished his last word the doors flew open and there stood the one other person who knew Saralina almost as well as Sirius.

"So kind of you to join us. We need your help." Sirius stated as he looked on towards the figure in the doorway. Dumbledore looked at Sirius with questions in his eyes but he wasn't looking at him. He was facing the person with tears in his eyes and a pleading in his face. "You need to help us. You are the only other one besides me qualified for this James."

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Okay so I know that it has been way too long, since I updated and I wanted to say I am so so so sorry that this is all i have come up with. I know that it is severely disappointing and short. But it is mostly a filler chapter. I have been trying to come up with some way for this story to go through this part, but it's a little harder than you would think. I would also like to think Lily_Potter again for the awesome ideas so it shouldn't be as long a wait for the next chapter! If you liked it tell me what you thought, if not tell me anyways i can improve thanks for reading!!!!


	18. Chapter 18

alright so once again...been forever and i will now start updating more frequently I just got my story stuff back :)..so here is another chapter if you have any questions or comments or suggestions just let me know! I take everything into consideration.

i know yall don't read these stories for the author's notes so here is the main attraction! Enjoy!

I don't own any copywrited characters or anything you recognize... sadly lol

**Chapter 18 - Break**

**RECAP!**__

_"So kind of you to join us. We need your help." Sirius stated as he looked on towards the figure in the doorway. Dumbledore looked at Sirius with questions in his eyes but he wasn't looking at him. He was facing the person with tears in his eyes and a pleading in his face. "You need to help us. You are the only other one besides me qualified for this James."_

"How is she? Is she okay?" James asked as he rushed to her bedside. He stared down at the lifeless body of Saralina White... one of his oldest childhood friends and right then was one of the only times in his life so far that he actually thought he would break down sobbing from the pain in his heart. It was hard to imagine that this frail, weak figure was once his vibrant, fierce best friend. She was his sister in all ways that count. "What do you need my help with Sirius?"

"Dumbledore here tells me that the only way to save her is to transfer all of our love and memories of us with her, the good and the bad, to her body and soul. He reckons it's the only way to save her. Of course there can possibly be other repurcussions right?" Sirius inquired as he looked up at the wise face of Albus Dumbledore.

Dumbledore chose his words wisely, he didn't want to frighten the poor boys from saving from their friend, but he also knew that they weren't the kind of just abandon someone they loved, especially someone as close to them as Saralina. "Well, her injuries are far beyond extensive, so she will need everything you could ever think of. Everything you felt, saw, or heard, everything hidden in your memories. Leave nothing out for her recovery. Yes there are some other ways this thing could go. Either, her brain gets so overwhelmed trying to heal her body and take in everything given and shut down, or she could be overflowing with all of your emotions and memories that she loses any connection she has to either of you." The boys looked up at their old professor with fear but a fierce determination, and love for their friend and nodded. They were ready to sacrifice everything they had to save the important person lying unconcious and almost dead in the bed beside them.

"Alright then, let's begin." Dumbledore mumbled, "Sirius stay on the side the left, James you on the right and hold her hands. Now rest your heads on your clasped hands and think of everything that ever happened between you. Send every memory, feeling, anything you can think of towards her while I say the incantation." They did as they were told and Dumbledore started to chant. Dumbledore could feel the love pouring out of the worried boy's souls and hoped it would be enough to work. He let his eyes roll into the back of his head as he chanted.

Sirius had his eyes closed, concentrating on anything he thought of to bring his Rali back. He was only pulled out of his thoughts by a short gasp across the bed from him. His eyes snapped open as he glared at James for ruining his concentration, but then he saw that James wasn't looking at him. He saw the hands they were holding start to glow before their eyes and then realized the body that was connected was not only glowing, but floating almost a foot off the bed. This change in her condition only made Sirius more determined. If something was happening, and Dumbledore wasn't freaking, it had to be a good thing right? No sooner than he closed his eyes, did Saralina start to shake.

"Dumbledore?" Sirius called. "What the hell is going on here?" He shared a terrified glance with James, but they both kept their thoughts flowing with memories as they watched their friend convulse and glow almost fluorescent. Dumbledore opened his eyes but did not stop chanting as they grew wide as saucers, taking in the scene before him. He watched as she raised too high for the boys to hold her hands and shook so violently that he was worried it would snap her neck. Then all of a sudden the glowing stopped and she curled into herself in mid air. It seemed like hours before anything happened when in reality it had only been a few seconds as they watched inraptured. It made them all jump as she threw her head back, and she was encased in a cocoon of light so bright they had to shield their eyes. Then everything went dark.

When Dumbledore opened his eyes what he saw made him almost cry in relief. She was in one piece. Every cut had been healed, every bloodstain wiped clean. As she lay on that hospital bed, as peaceful as she would be sleeping, he took in the changes. She was no longer wearing that outrageous dress, but a long white robe. Her hair was no longer matted with blood but was in a single perfect braid that ran almost the length of her body. It was astonishing and now all they had to do was wait for her to wake up.

Sirius and James opened their eyes to the sight and sighed loudly. It would only be a matter of time before they could gaze into her beautiful, unique eyes and confess their apologies. Sirius knew he wasn't thinking logically and that she had a hell of a lot to be mad at him for, but for now he was just glad that everything was going to be okay. That she was lying calm, and completely healed in this bed, with her chest rising and falling with long, deep breaths. Then when he didn't think this moment could get any better he saw her slowly open her eyes.

Saralina looked around. She wasn't in the dungeon anymore, it looked like she was in a hospital. Thank the Gods that someone had enough decency to get her some help after what they put her through. However, as soon as she thought this images from this night ran through her head like a sped up movie. Every flash of a spell, and all of the horrible things she did to those people showered down on her conscious and she had to fight not to scream. She sat up with speed and scared everyone else in the room to death. As she took her turn looking at them they could see her eyes, and what they saw made them think twice about her being better. Not only was her whole body shaking with tremors, but her eyes were filled with everything from justification to remorse. Although they could see every conflicting emotion that passed through her eyes, it wasn't the emotions so much as the eyes themselves that gave them pause.

Whenever she looked at them it wasn't Saralina's gorgeous eyes, but the eyes of the Goddess in her. There was no blue in sight. The whites of her eyes had turned a shiny, but dense black color that looked like it was shimmering in her eyes, but the pupil was another story. It was a pure snow white. It was eery of course but Sirius was not about to complain. He had his Rali right in front of him sitting up, and looking around. The only worrying thing about this is that she should already be cussing up a storm at not only her behavior, but his as well, she had not said a word. Not even made a sound.

After a beat Dumbledore walked up to her bed next to her head and slowly whispered, "Saralina? Darling are you okay? Do you understand me?" She suddenly sat very still.

"Albus...?" She rasped out, it felt like a thousand knives were piercing her throat when she tried to talk but she had to know. "I have a question."

"Go ahead dear, what is it?" he said in that gentle, all knowing tone of his.

She looked towards him, and said without an ounce of fear or trepidation, "Why can't I see?"

Yay! Laura finally got a chapter out! lol I'm am so unbelievably sorry for the wait and the inexcusably short chapter, but I had to give yall something I have kept you waiting for months, and I finally got this out. Well give me some input! I know it definitely was not worth the wait, but I'm trying I promise! Leave me a review :)


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